Archive for the ‘Cum’ Category

Hey, I Saw the Crude Sketches in the Boys' Restroom Way Before That

(class is watching a science video)
Scientist in the video: The problem with the big bang is that we know nothing about it. We don't when it banged, why it banged, how it banged, what exactly was being banged…
(entire class laughs)
Smart-ass student: See, when a man loves a woman…
Smarter-ass student: Please, as if you didn't just learn that last year in bio! –Stuyvesant High School

…but Yes

Kinky girl: Have you ever thought about tasting your own cum?
Other girl: Are you fucking serious? We're in Times Square right now. Twenty people probably heard that. –Times Square Overheard by: No thank you

Does He Fight You for It?

Drunk girl #1: My boyfriend likes to swallow his ejacu– Ejacu–
Drunk girl #2: It’s ‘ejaculate.’
Drunk girl #1: Is that normal? –Manhattan-bound L train Overheard by: What is normal?

Let's Make Some Coffee–These Negotiations Could Take All Night.

Cute blonde: I like fucking you. No, I love fucking you.
Buff guy: Yeah.
Cute blonde: But if I suck your dick and you cum, you'll fall asleep.
Buff guy: How about you suck my dick and then I fuck you?
Cute blonde: That never happens. But if you come with me to my friend Sam's party, I'll suck your dick. –4 Train