Young lady: Stupid people have more fun! –Chrystie & Housten Overheard by: Probably True… Middle age woman to young woman pushing stroller: Well, this is a stupid place for a stroller! –Times Square Overheard by: Would the street be safer? Oversized hip-hop boyfriend to undersized girlfriend: I'm being stupid for your benefit. –Duane Reade Woman buying ibuprofen: It's not a virus. My mother's got a headache from everyone being stupid. –Inwood Overheard by: Rose Fox Girl smoking on the sidewalk to smoking friend: He's perfect. Except that he's kind of dumb. But he's perfect! –34th St & Madison Ave Overheard by: Katface
Crazy lady: Can I taste that pizza?
Whole Foods employee: No, you're only allowed one sample, and I already gave you one.
Crazy lady: No, you didn't!
Employee: Yes I did, I can see it in your mouth!
Guy in line: Gross. –Whole Foods, Union Square
Woman looking over jewelry on sidewalk table: Where are these necklaces from?
Seller: Wherever you want them to be from, baby. –5th Ave & 52nd St
Woman: I'm from Utah.
Fruit vendor: Utah!? I've never even heard of anybody from Utah! –Union Square Farmers Market Overheard by: I've *heard* of them, but I don't believe in them
Chick: So, you’re working here now?
Barista guy: Well, had they taught me karate from a young age like they were supposed to I would be fighting shoguns in Japan right now. –Park Slope coffee shop Overheard by: kendell chambers
Lady: …and a half-pound of roasted brussels sprouts with peas.
Counter guy: Those are actually pearl onions, ma’am.
Lady: Well, the sign says peas.
Counter guy: I’m terribly sorry, ma’am, but the person who made that sign is an idiot…No really, that’s her over there. Complete dipshit. –Gourmet Garage, 7th Avenue Overheard by: Jamie Lloyd
Man: So, what's your name?
Man: Well, hello Jessica! I'm Brown.
Waitress: (nods head uninterested)
Man: Like the bear.
Waitress:(walks away) –Bar, 34th St & 3rd Ave Overheard by: MMM
Guy: Hey, I’m lookin’ for a book.
Lady behind the counter: Um, okay. Did you have any particular one in mind?
Guy, laughing: No. Hell no. I don’t fuckin’ read. I’m just lookin’ for something I can take over to Central Park so I can get hit on by chicks who think I’m smart and shit.
Lady behind counter: Try Nietzsche. –Barnes & Noble, Broadway between 82nd & 83rd
Anal Man: I want a grilled chicken wrap. But I don’t want cheese and I want a little bit of dressing on the bread as you’re making it. Some places don’t put dressing.
Cashier: We don’t put dressing here.
Anal Man: Just a bit of dressing. Not too much.
Cashier: Do you want the combo?
Anal Man: No! –Ranch 1, Union Square
Starbucks barista: Sorry, we're all out of bananas. Would you like to try something else?
Beach bum tanning girl: But I never drink anything from here that doesn't have bananas.
Starbucks barista: Well, we have some bananas in the back, but they still look green.
Beach bum tanning girl, clearly confused: If they're green on the outside, does that mean they're green on the inside too? –Starbucks, Staten Island Overheard by: Jacqueline Battaglia