Drunk: Where’s my boy, man? –Odessa, Ave. A
Deli guy: Yo Susan, how’s life treating you?
Customer: Bad. I need an new life.
Deli guy: Your life’s almost over and you need a new one? –Bensonhurst
Where: Bedford Ave., Yuppietown Hobo: …and the rest of you will be buried in cement!
Guy on cell: Yeah, our lives suck but at least John Kerry was elected President. Oh, wait! I have to hang up now and go kill myself. –Washington Square Park Overheard by: Alice Ayers
Drunk Claire: Steph, we’ve been best friends for, like, 15 years now. You are like, totally my very best friend, but I wish you could, like, make more time for me, you know? Like, I know you have your grandmother’s party coming up and all–
Drunk Steph: Claire, my grandmother died 4 years ago. –West Village
Chick: Yeah, deers aren’t that bad. You’re in trouble if you hit a cow, though. And even worse would be a moose, because if you don’t kill it it’s gonna kill you! –Williamsburg Overheard by: Danger!!!!
Man: A woman was killed today by a falling cross.
Woman: Oh my God! –Madison & 42nd
Girl #1: I love Kurt Cobain. I so would have had sex with him.
Girl #2: That’s like #60 in a long line of dead celebrities you would have had sex with. You’re such a slut!
Girl #1: No, see, you can have sex with as many dead celebrities as you want and not be a whore. It’s the rules. –Barnes & Noble, Union Square
Guy on cell: I’m going to kill you, and it’s going to hurt. You know that, right?…I’m not talking shit! –Duane Reade, 44th & 5th
Idiot, 50s: That’s the one argument against capital punishment that cannot be refuted. If you do it, someone is dead. –Westway Diner, 9th Ave