Man #1: I feel like with this new Speedo shit it's unfair, they're all breaking world records. They should swim in the nude, so it's fair. Plus, you could see their dongs.
Man #2: Michael Phelps' dong! That's why I like basketball, because they all wear shorts and you can at least see a outline.
–The Abbey Bar
Overheard by: Robyn Stegman
Archive for the ‘Default’ Category
Now C'mon, Let's Go Get Your Tubes Tied
Girl #1: I don't understand why parents are upset when babies die…it's not like they've accomplished anything.
Girl #2: I think there's more to it than that.
–Howard Ave, Staten Island
I'd Totally Punch Him If My Triceps Weren't Sore from All the Gold-Digging
Mom with stroller: It's not the strippers I'm mad about, it's the 1,200 dollars.
Friend: Totally.
Mom with stroller: He could have bought me the diamond earrings I've been wanting with that.
Friend: Oh, the little diamond studs you keep talking about? I love those.
–7th Ave & Bleecker
Overheard by: John E
And It Fits Me Like a Glove!
Person #1: New suit?
Person #2: No, I got cancer.
–Broadway
She Thinks Dictionaries Are for Sucking
Dyed blonde: What's a “hatch”? As in “down the hatch”?
Blonde: Oh, that's like when baby birds break out of their eggs!
Brunette: Don't ask the blonde!
–3rd St & 6th Ave
Overheard by: It's part of a ship, actually
I'm Thinking! I'm Thinking!
Black lady #1: Do you like cheese?
Black lady #2: Cheese?
Black lady #1: Cheese…
Black lady #2: (…)
Black lady #1: Cheese, cheese!
–New York Port Authority
Overheard by: Igor Petrov
Which Is the Rarely-Invoked Exception to the “Dirty Dog” Clause
Wall Street suit #1: Wait, wait–you did it in her parent's house…while her parents were home?! You dirty dog!
Wall Street suit #2: They have a water bed!
Wall Street suit #1: Dude!
–Au Bon Pain, Broadway & W 3rd
Reader Poll: What's Going on Here?
Girl #1: Wow, you must be in so much pain.
Girl #2: Not really, I'll just be really embarrassed when I have to change my pants.
–Minskoff Theatre
Overheard by: FerretMan
Hey, You're the One Who Said Hot-Pink Rhinestones Were Coming Back
Girl #1, coming out of bar: Oh my god, can you believe he thought I was interested in him? My tastes are way better than that!
Girl #2: And yet you bought that jacket.
Girl #1: What did you say?
Girl #2: Nothing…
–Bedford & 9th St
Overheard by: I agree with your friend
With Slightly Less Gold
Ditz #1: Did you know Beverly Hills was, like, its own city?
Ditz #2: Yeah, it's like the Vatican!
–2nd & 7th
Overheard by: Like, Totally.