Archive for the ‘Diet/Weight’ Category

…and I snuck in a brunch or two.

Brit Businessman: I hate having to eat. Because you eat and you just feel like a fattie.
Brit Businesswoman: I haven’t eaten.
Brit Businessman: You haven’t eaten?
Brit Businesswoman: Well, I had breakfast and then lunch. –57th and Park Overheard by: Heather

Europeans Speak on the Issues: The ESB

British Woman: So, what’s the purpose of the Empire State Building again?
British Man: It’s a sign of American power. –Empire State Building Overheard by: Katherine O’Brien Little Italian Guy: I’ll bet this whole building weighs at least a thousand pounds. –Empire State Building (365,000 tons) Overheard by: Stomach Aches

Overheard in the Headlines

An elevator equipped with a TV monitor shows a news segment of a man who just rescued a person swept away by floodwaters in California. Yuppie Prick #1: Wow, that guy is fat. Can you imagine him saving anyone?
Yuppie Prick #2: Nope!
Fat Bystander: Not unless it was your miserable ass in the water, and he was savin’ you, jerkoff! –Midtown elevator