Archive for the ‘Directions’ Category

Anthony Michael Hall: “Can I Borrow Your Wednesday One-Liners for 10 Minutes?”

Professor: They make disposable everything these days. Disposable diapers, disposable razors. They even make edible underwear, don't they? (class is silent) Yes! They do! (pause) Maybe I'm telling you more about myself than I should be…

–Wagner College

Girl: Wait, my panties!

–Franklin St

Guy on phone: I told you to take your thong off!

–60th & Columbus

Man: I do not want to know your bra size! Ever!

–Hunter College

Overheard by: Christina M.

Guy on cell: He wore boxers and it was like, "okay, so you hang to the left…"

–W 46th St

Older gentleman to lady friend: If this keeps up, I'm going to have to start wearing underwear.

–14th St & 1st Ave

Overheard by: Kat

Tour De Wednesday One-Liners

Large female southern tourist: It'd be really funny if we got stuck on the toilet and couldn't get up. It'd be the whole "help! Get me off this toilet!" thing.

–Bathroom, Metropolitan Museum of Art

Tourist woman to husband: Where's that cop who was here a minute ago? He gave me the wrong directions, and I wanna cuss him out for it!

–Penn Station

Overheard by: Deeds

Tourist: Is this the building where people go all crazy about the numbers?

–Outside New York Stock Exchange

Overheard by: Kyle

50-something tourist husband to wife, while they share bites of same apple: I don't know why we came to this city… We can't even afford breakfast.

–34th & 7th