Archive for the ‘Druggies’ Category

The Search for Meaning Is Making Me Tired

Chick: Do you ever wonder if we’ll get tired of being so rich? You know, like what if later in life we randomly, like, decide to renounce our possessions or something drastic and move to Africa?
Man: What, are you saying you don’t enjoy our lifestyle anymore?
Chick: I don’t know… hey, do you wanna get some coke later?

–82nd & 1st

Overheard by: chuzzle in space

Your Weekly Re-Up of Wednesday One-Liners

Bike messenger screaming to another: That’s why I love you. Because you support my drug habit!

–3rd Ave & 10th St

Five-year-old with mother: I’m gonna get get get you hiiiigghh!

–10th & Broadway

Overheard by: evanescent

Mom to three-year-old daughter: Sit up! Sit up! Are you on crack?

–2 train, the Bronx

Overheard by: MK

Professor: I remember this one acid trip…

–NYU, Silver Center

Overheard by: Limey

Stoner dude: I get high to get high. I don’t expect much, but it passes time and it kills hangovers.

–17th & 8th

Overheard by: Lara

Thugette on pimped-out cell: Honey, I told yo’ ass before, I’ll tell you again: once a nigga puts rims on his Fed-Ex truck, you know he’s a drug dealer

–36th Ave station, Astoria

Overheard by: Akojam Milas

Someone Should Complain to Her Soup-ervisor

Bag lady: Ladies and gentlemen, my husband and I are homeless. We can’t stay at our shelter during the day so we come on the train to get food. Today we are asking for money so we can do laundry. Anything you can give will help.
Hobo: Why don’t you just admit that you’re gonna buy crack? I’m in the same line of work, don’t believe her. –N train

I Don't Care If She Has a Name. Now Make Me a Square Burger, Bitch

Dopey guy: She looks like that chick on the Wendy's commercials.
Less dopey guy: Um…you mean…Wendy?

–Drop Off Service, 13th & Ave A

Headline by: aileen

Runners-Up:
· “…AKA Pippi Longstocking’s Doppelgänger” – Deanna
· “No, Carrot Top” – johnnyb
· “She Has a NAME?!?!” – sizzle
· “Until Pippi Longstocking Wins Her Lawsuit, Yes” – Cat


Click here to see the new Headline Contest