Archive for the ‘Druggies’ Category

Happy Birthday, Mithras!

Red State Girl: Is that a hammer in your bag?
Dealer: Yeah. It’s a metaphor. ‘Cause Jesus was a carpenter, see. And I walk with Jesus.
Red State Girl: Oh. –29th Street & 7th Ave. Overheard by: M. Martin

…And Smoke Them on Behalf Of the Recipients

20-something girl to much older date: So do you smoke weed?
Guy: Not so much anymore.
20-something girl: Me either… Not much… I mean, it's been a long time… But I do know this awesome guy on St. Mark's who gives me cheap pipes and has great shit. He always has something new for me.
Guy, after pause: Actually, it sounds like you smoke a lot.
20-something girl, after embarrassed pause: Well… I buy a lot of gifts.

–G Train

Dear Uncle Sam– Have You Thought About Creating Food Stamps Specifically for Drugs?

Dealer: You got the rest of the money?
Buyer: Yeah, it's right here–look in the sock. (hands him sock)
Dealer, looking in sock: Bitch, I ain't no grocery! I ain't take yo' food stamps! (throws contents of sock–change and stamps–all on the ground)

–Nostrand Ave & St Mark's

Overheard by: whyileftbrooklyn

Hugs, Not Wednesday One-Liners!

NYU professor: Stay away from drugs. (pause) Unless they're recreational and you know what you're doing!

–NYU Silver Center

Overheard by: liz

Tall kid: I don't like opiates in general. I'm for up, not down. At any rate, I have a fucking honky horn!

–Hunter College High School

Guy: I think I need to do more shrooms and acid.

–Union Square Park

Overheard by: Jordan

Girl to friend: You should try something natural, like shrooms.

–Union Square

Overheard by: Julie

Druggie clerk on cell: I mean: come on, man! That's my fucking apartment. If he wants to smoke weed or shoot up in my apartment, it's like, whatever. But crack? No. That's my fucking home. Seriously.

–St. Mark's Place

Overheard by: Emmy