Archive for the ‘Duane Reade’ Category

Wednesday One-Liners: Glug Glug Glug, Ahh!

NYU student to another: I haven't been drinking as much since I turned 21.

–Duane Reade

Overheard by: Rogelio

College girl to friend: I wasn't drunk, I was just cheerful.

–Canal St & Mott St

20-something girl on cell: He was drunk and fucking his demon ex-girlfriend.

–181 & Ft. Washington

Guy in dirty army clothes to another: I was still drunk, thank god Dunkin' Donuts was open.

–D Train

Middle aged guy on cell: That's what happens when you drink, motherfucker! You can't remember shit!

–Brooklyn

Overheard by: Aron

Thanks to the Hypnotic Rhythm Of Our Argument

Woman in line at Duane Reade: I drank your water, um, that bottle of bottled water?
Boyfriend: The one with the vodka in it?
Woman: Yeah, and it, um, tasted funny. I had to lie down.
Boyfriend: Are you going to apologize?
Woman: No.
Boyfriend: Are you going to apologize?
Woman: No.
Boyfriend: Are you going to apologize?
Woman: No. You should have come to bed.
Boyfriend: I did. You were asleep.

–59th St & 10th Ave

Overheard by: Tanker

Wednesday One-Liners for Kendra

Young lady: Stupid people have more fun!

–Chrystie & Housten

Overheard by: Probably True…

Middle age woman to young woman pushing stroller: Well, this is a stupid place for a stroller!

–Times Square

Overheard by: Would the street be safer?

Oversized hip-hop boyfriend to undersized girlfriend: I'm being stupid for your benefit.

–Duane Reade

Woman buying ibuprofen: It's not a virus. My mother's got a headache from everyone being stupid.

–Inwood

Overheard by: Rose Fox

Girl smoking on the sidewalk to smoking friend: He's perfect. Except that he's kind of dumb. But he's perfect!

–34th St & Madison Ave

Overheard by: Katface