Archive for the ‘Elevators’ Category

Wednesday One-Liner: What Is It Good For?

Cleaner: What a pair of tits on that girl! That's why we go to war, that's why we're in Iraq! –Service Elevator, Lexington & 41st St Overheard by: Nicky Annoying chick, about John McCain: I mean, he was a POW because he fucked up! –Shea Stadium Overheard by: megan Security guard, breaking up fight during peace march: You can't fight at the peace march! You can't fight at the peace march! –143 & Malcolm X Woman to screaming three-year-old: And that's why you have to register to vote! Or else they'll draft you and you'll have to go to war! –33rd & 2nd Girl on phone: I can just get a pass from the Israeli army. Don't worry about it. They're easy. –NYU Palladium Dining Hall

They Used to Be

Guy: So you went out with this great guy, and then he just told you he’s a girl?
Girl: Yeah.
Guy: I just love having these crazy conversations in the elevator, and everyone thinks you’re insane. Doors open. Everyone gets out. Guy: This is your floor? Oh no! Those people are your neighbors! –Elevator, 96th & Columbus

Someone Has to Set Our Gender Back

College girl #1: Yeah, she’s afraid to go out anywhere. She always thinks she’s going to get raped.
College girl #2: I don’t understand the big deal about rape. If it happened to me I’d be like, ‘Oh, well, it was bound to happen.’
College girl #3: Haha, you’d probably like it.
College girl #2, nodding: Yeah, I would. –Elevator in apartment building Overheard by: Neil

Wanna Bet?

Girl #1: Just stop thinking about it, god.
Girl #2: I can't…it's just new, and big to swallow, y'know?
Girl #1: Well, I'm sure he's not thinking about it all the time. –Elevator, 5th Ave Overheard by: Kyle

Welcome Back to School, New York

Girl: Yo! What we did in English today? –24th between 7th & 8th Orientation girl: We have three orientations going on right now: Gallatin, CAS and Stern. GSP orientation starts next week.
Guy: GSP? Isn’t that the special ed NYU? –Elevator, NYU Kimmel Center Girl on cell: Well, what do you think I should wear?…Nah, I mean isn’t the first day of school a sort of wear underwear day? –86th & Lex