Girlfriend to fiance, while shaking ring off of finger: Look, my ring is getting too big again. Am I losing weight?
Fiance: You're losing weight and I'm losing interest in you.
–E 95th St
Overheard by: Sarah
Archive for the ‘Fashion’ Category
Wednesday One-Liners Eat at Friendly's
Mother to four-year-old making loud, weird noises in stroller: Will you shut up? See… That's why you don't have any friends.
–Supermarket, Astoria, Queens
Overheard by: George O.
Woman on cell: She put my friendship on the line for a Chanel bag! (pause) So I guess I'm worth like, $600 dollars.
–Starbucks, Astor Place
Overheard by: Kade
Angry woman to man: You had to fuck my friend?! You couldn't think of a better place to put your dick?
–Elevator, 75 Wall St
Overheard by: Jonathan
Seated guy to standing woman: I was out drinking with a friend. Well, less of a friend and more my parole officer…
–L Train
Overheard by: Bradburnside
Suit to woman: I don't believe in friends, ya know?
–22nd & 6th
Overheard by: Edyna
Stupid Babies
Teen girl #1: Ugh, I hate that when you get pregnant you have to get a new belly ring.
Teen girl #2: Ugh! I know, that's why I'm not getting one yet.
–Bus Stop, Queens
Wednesday One-Liners Treat Women and Men the Same
Film student: There's subtext to butt-sex?
–School of Visual Arts
Girl, to guy: Was your dick *in* my ass? Did we just do anal?
–Lower East Side
College girl: And my butthole is probably a lot tighter than hers.
–LIRR
Middle aged suit: I think I'd really enjoy anal because I always take such big craps.
–Union Square
Overheard by: alib
Woman to friend: Did you know the latest teenage fad is butt sex?
–177th St & Broadway
Wednesday One-Minors
Seven-year-old boy to father: Did you know that when you get into middle school, all the girls care about is whether you're rich and have a cute ass? In elementary school, they only care about if you can run fast. If you run the fastest, you get all the girls.
–Flushing, Queens
Overheard by: Tara
Small boy to teacher in increasingly panicky voice: Is this Narnia? We're not Narnians yet, right?!
–NYU Kimmel Center
Overheard by: Narnia @ NYU?
Five-year-old to three-year-old brother: Listen, we're going to have food all winter. It's hibernation. You know what hibernation is, don't you? Hibernation is when animals eat a lot of food and sleep all winter. We're gonna hibernate!
–M104 Bus
Overheard by: Samantha
Little kid: Grandma, smell this! It's Obsession for Men!
–Bergdorf Goodman
Sobbing five-year-old girl to mom in CD section: I wanna download, I don't wanna waste my money.
–Borders, Columbus Circle
Overheard by: Can records labels sue toddlers?
Wednesday One-Liners Do It Doggie Style
Woman: So what if I sleep with dogs for money?
–Chrystie St & Delancey
Middle-aged woman, after being told her puppies can't enter store: That's why I live in LA, they're much more dog-friendly there. Now, can you please get me the Lady Gaga CD?
–Barnes & Noble
Young woman, seeing three-legged dog: Three-legged dogs are kinda trendy these days.
–Sunset Park
Overheard by: Matty
Woman to another, walking out of subway: I'm telling you, chihuahuas are fucking taking over the city.
–Bedford Ave & 7th St
Overheard by: J Wing
Man in '80s garb, getting off train and pumping arms in great exaltation: The dog is back!
–Steinway Street
Overheard by: Jo Ann Chism
Fucking Nerd
Boy #1: Dude, you are totally not a nerd anymore, just like I'm not that emo.
Boy #2: No, you're still totally emo.
Boy #1: What the fuck, dude? Look, only two bracelets and I'm so not rocking the eyeliner anymore.
Boy #2: Still emo.
–1 Train
…We'll Be Late for the Porcelain Doll Convention!
Slavic guy to metro friend getting manicure: Hey, pay for mine too.
Metro friend: You want to get one?
Slavic guy, laughing and walking out: No!
–Fashion Nails, 13th & Ave A
Overheard by: erkala
The Thin Line Between Disney and Kink: Encapsulated.
College boy: I used to work with those people who dress up as cartoon characters.
College girl: Ohhhh! You mean furries?
–Pratt Institute
Don't Lesbians Keep Nuts Away from Their Ears?
Sporty teen girl: So, I'm pretty sure Amy* is a lesbian. She never straightens her hair, and she always wears those coconut earrings…
Blonde friend: You wear coconut earrings.
Sporty teen girl: Yeah, but not every day!
–Central Park