Archive for the ‘Fears’ Category

Ok, That’s My New Worst Fear Too

Girl #1: My worst fear is falling on a picket fence or getting eaten by a shark.
Girl #2: Oh yeah, well my worst fear is someone pushing me forward onto a blackboard and having my teeth scrape down the front. That would be awful. –Grand Central Station

36 Chambers of Wednesday One-Liners

Homegirl on cell: You live in Staten Island, that’s too close to the wilderness, near the border. I am not emotionally ready to meet you in Staten Island. –LIRR Suit: He’s from Staten Island. That my Graceland. –53rd & 6th Overheard by: The Sock Asian chick: What is that fruit called? Durian? That thing stinks so bad! It stinks like Staten Island bad! –G Train Overheard by: paco Girl #1: In how many stops do we get off?
Girl #2: [Blank stare.] –Staten Island Ferry Conductor: Ladies and gentlemen, the next stop is South Ferry. From there, you can go to the wonderful Battery Park, go see the beautiful Statue of Liberty… Or go to Staten Island. –1 Train Overheard by: Smarlow

Wednesday One-Liners Are So Archaic and Bourgeoise

20-something woman to friend: Man, can I just tell you how absolutely bizarre coffee shop conversations are in this area?! I am never ever getting married if this is the sort of stuff married women talk about all day. –Smith & Bergan Overheard by: Mako Shark 30-something to older woman: I can’t get married yet! I haven’t experienced even… half of the women in the world yet! –86th & Broadway Overheard by: Carol Tween boy getting into the face of another tween boy: (loudly) I’ll be your fucking wife! –Morgan’s Market Overheard by: Akiko Little boy: We saw a peanut marrying a princess! –Penn Station Overheard by: blue Girl to friends: I think my husband’s gonna divorce me now that gay marriage is legal. –N10th & Bedford Ave, Williamsburg Overheard by: Non Hipster Woman in a wedding dress and veil, on cell: Yeah, I got kicked out. –Penn Station