A man hands a woman a brochure for erectile dysfunction. Man: I’m not only the president, I’m also a client. –MetroNorth Train Overheard by: Mark
Comedy show guy: Would you folks like to go to stand-up comedy tonight?
Tourist group leader: Well, do we have to have to stand the whole time?
–43rd & Broadway
Overheard by: organizedchaos
Flyers girl: Hi, would you like to come to a party?
Guy: No, thanks.
Flyers girl: Why do people keep lying to me?
Guy: I’m not a person. –14th & Broadway Overheard by: Will Person
Street promoter: Yo, do you like rap music?
Teenage Tourist: I’m from the South.
Environmentalist giving out fliers: Excuse me sir, do you care about helping our environment?
Man: Oh no thank you, I’m a Republican.
–14th & 5th
Overheard by: Dave
Flyer guy: Here.
Chick: No thanks.
Flyer guy: No? What the fuck you mean, “no”? –Union Square
Pamphleteers: Take this pamphlet — we swear we aren’t fanatics!
Guy: I’m sure you aren’t, unlike those Jews for Jesus assholes.
Pamphleteer: We are from Jews for Jesus! [Guy walks away laughing.]
–St. Mark’s & 2nd
Overheard by: tired of those pamphlets
An activist interrupts a group of yuppie chicks having a discussion.
Activist: Do you have a minute for gay rights?
Chick #1: Sorry.
Activist: Have a good day. He leaves them to their conversation. Chick #1: Then he’s been getting after me about how I’m selfish, and about how selfish I am. –Union Square
Wide-eyed woman on cell: Is it the drugs that are doing this to me?
–St Mark's & Ave A
Guy going superfast on a bike with eyes closed and feet on handlebars: Oh, man, I'm trippin'! Oh, god, I'm shroomin'!
Professor: Take that Ritalin-Scotch-heroin cocktail… With a pop-tart!
Overheard by: Denali
Flyer guy: Anyone want to help support my drug habit?
Girl with group of friends: You can be a responsible drug addict… I had two jobs and went to college.
–Jane & 4th St
Overheard by: M Tod
Barnard girl: So my grandparents gave me one of those Visa gift card things for $50 for Valentine's Day… What the fuck am I going to spend $50 on, if it's not drugs?
–The Diana Center, Barnard College
Stephen Colbert, after flubbing a line during filming: I'm high. (audience laughs) Don't blog that!
–Colbert Report Studios, 54th St
Overheard by: Allison
Comedy show peddler with very deep voice: Hey, do you guys want to see a comedy show?
Teenage girl, making fun of his voice: No!
Comedy show peddler: Why the hell not?!
Teenage girl: We hate comedy!
Comedy show peddler: Goddamnit, what the hell is wrong with you?!
Overheard by: Lauren