Archive for the ‘Flyer people’ Category

Wednesday One-Liners Read Overheard in the Office

Conductor: Are you going to work? Are you going somewhere? Let us know by getting out of train doors.

–R train, Lexington Ave stop

Bartender swinging nipple tassels: Can you believe they wouldn’t let me do this at my old job?!

–Bar, Broadway, between 76th & 77th

Overheard by: Lezbotron

IT guy: I can break whatever I want, because I fix it!

–Office, 45th & 3rd

Overheard by: beans

I-banker to two others: He got the bonus for people that don’t get bonuses.

–Metro-North

Comedy club flyer guy: I hate my job, and it’s all your fault!

–Times Square

30-something hippie at show: 2008 is the year that I get a job.

–New Year’s Eve concert

Overheard by: Smash

Wednesday One-Liners Got Mad People Skills

Man selling newspapers: Get your newspapers here and I’ll buy you a drink! … Don’t listen to me — I’m here to sell you newspapers.

–32nd & 6th

CD hawker: You lookin’ for the bus to Mars? It comes in right over here! [Minutes later.] C’mon, white people! Spend money! Hey, white people! I’m black people!

–8th & Broadway

Flyer lady to line of people: You guys need to read this — it’s important. It’s about the waterboarding issue and the new attorney general. Please read these — all about the new attorney general. What’s his name? Makaskey? Or… Something… This is really important.

–Washington Square South

Overheard by: jen

Pamphlet guy: Hey, man, you want to save the kids? No, you don’t. Just keep walking — who cares?

–Union Square

Hawker: I’ll trade anyone their Starbucks coffee for a Zipcar flyer!

–Spring St station

Overheard by: Lalaith

Flyer lady: Hey, girl — you betta stop. Buy a leather jacket! Make you look so sexy and hot. Make your man wanna hit that spot!

–Manhattan Mall

Overheard by: I don’t need a jacket for that, BiTCheSSSSS

Flyer girl: Take this flyer. Buy a sweater for your pretty wife — get hot sex tonight!

–34th St

You Look Like People Who Could Use Some Wednesday One-Liners

Paper guy: AM News! AM News! Low prices! Low-tech news!

–Greeley Square, 32nd St

Overheard by: Mary Beth Hanlon

Thug handing out flyers: You don’t have to take one, it’s okay, because at the end of the day I’ll still be crisp.

–Manhattan Mall

Overheard by: Alex Berkowitz

Umbrella vendor, after it starts raining: It’s not too late… Save her hairdo!

–W. 47th St. & Broadway

Overheard by: Maggie

Flyer guy: Oh, man, I can’t do this — this job ain’t for me. I can’t take all the rejection!

–Clinton & Delancey

Guy selling umbrellas: I believe in all of you! I have umbrellas for you!

–33rd & 7th

Overheard by: smoon