Overheard In New York

Archive for the ‘Foreigners’ Category

That’s a Show I Want to See

American Man: Do they know in Africa who Helen Keller is?
African Woman: Yes…didn’t she have a television show a couple of years ago? –Forest Hills

You know you’re Not in New York when… (Part Nine)

Woman walking in Stanley Park in Vancouver to the man with her: “Your serotonin levels seem really high today.”

You know you’re Not in New York when… (Part Eight)

Bus-driver in Vancouver: “The BC government recently did a study about fraud on the bus system, and the company they hired concluded that 3% of the riders take advantage of the system. But driving this bus every day, I see that it is really 30-40%. The newspapers say that Canadians are so good but it’s not true!”

How you know you’re not in New York (part 2)

Tourist in Vancouver: Where is a neighborhood with lots of bars and cafes? Vancouverite: The street with all the bars and cafes is…. [then points and gives directions]

Latka or Balki?

Waitress: How do you want your burgers cooked?
Foreigner: Cooked?
Waitress: Meat is cooked. What color do you want the meat inside to be? Pink, red, brown?
Foreigner: What?! –Jackson Hole, 36th Street

These People Really Do Exist in New York…

A fat Italian “businessman” in a Members Only jacket is standing on the corner talking to 2 other fat Italian guys. An SUV drives by, honks the horn twice, and then speeds off. The “businessman” turns around quickly and loudly yells: Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Fuckin’ faggot. –LES