Archive for the ‘Gangstas’ Category

Wednesday One-Liners: Large and in Charge

Exhausted woman with backpack: Why do I have to be so fat? –42nd St Gossip Girl clone to another: Oh my god! Can you even imagine being obese in this weather? –Lafayette & Spring Skinny gangster white boy: Yo, dude, are we hanging out with those fat chicks? –96th St & Lexington Overheard by: great standards Chubby girl yelling on cell: Yeah, and her bridesmaid dress totally accentuates my back fat–as if I didn't have enough problems! –47th & 3rd

“I'm a Wednesday One-Liners, I'm a Lover, I'm a Child, I'm a Mother…”

Young mother to toddler son, about creepy man on train: Don't be like him when you grow up. Guys like him don't get a lotta bitches." –4 Train Overheard by: Mollie Reznick JAP to companion: Gosh, I hate her. She's such a bitch. No, we haven't met before. I don't want to meet her; she's a bitch. –L Train Overheard by: high school was so two years ago Woman leaving voicemail: Don't worry about the page 6 thing. It'll blow over, then we'll bury that bitch! –Washington Square Park Overheard by: David G Gangsta: So then I had my wedding ring melted down and put in my mouth. So every time that bitch saw me smile, she saw my ring. –A Train Overheard by: jm LIRR commuter: And look, I love my daughter to death, but that girl is a *bitch*! –Penn Station Overheard by: Andy

Not in the Face, Wednesday One-Liner!

Man on phone: Wait, so she bit you? Dude! Wait, what? She punched you? Oh, you went to punch her? Dude, you punched her? –Penn Station Too young for final stage alcoholism guy: I totally held my own. I knocked the girl out and fucked the guy up. –10th St & Ave A Gangster: Next time I see him, I'ma kick him in his good leg. –Uptown F Train Softball-player-looking girl to friends: If you ever wear a tiara at your wedding, I'm going to punch you in the face. –Wagner Park Overheard by: mclaire Young mother to others: Yeah, but you hafta be careful. You can't just hit your kids in public. –Rivington & Essex Overheard by: verbal abuse ftw! Boyfriend to girlfriend: But if I punch you in the throat you will stop breathing. –SoHo Teen girl: Did you see that? I almost punched Ira's glass in the chest! That was awesome! –AMC Theater, 19th St & Broadway Overheard by: Katie

Wednesday One-Liners Symbolically Take Back the Power

Black dude to friend: Well, check this out my nigga! Cracking your knuckles does not lead to arthritis… Mythbusters, my nigga! –Park Slope Black pimp on cell: That nigger ain't even give you a little nigga baby. All that nigga ever do is just fuck you and leave your ass, bitch. You got a child yoself, take care of your real nigga baby, because that's the nigga who keeps with you. That nigga won't fuck any other sluts. (notices everybody's staring at him) What the fuck y'all niggas lookin at? –Social Security Office, East Village Would-be feminist: Pussy don't have no power no more, because if it did, niggas wouldn't be doin' what they do. –Jefferson Ave & Throop Ave, Brooklyn Overheard by: Jocasta Spell Polish woman, walking up to group of ghetto fabs: Yo' wut up, my niggas? (pounds fist with ghetto fab guy) –Delancy St Overheard by: Kirkegaard Crazy black man on phone: When you talk like that I'm gonna call you the N-word! (pause) Don't talk like that! (pause) I want to have sex with you. –Murray Hill