Archive for the ‘Ground Zero’ Category

I’m So Fast, They Call Me the Chrysler Building

Two male twins, dressed alike, in their 20s, address two female twins, dressed alike, in their 20s. Male twins: Hey! Are you twins?! You twins?! That’s great! We’re twins too! Hey, we’re twins too!
Female twins: Mmmhmm.
Male twins: You ain’t twins! You lesbians! She look like she wanna get it on with you! You ain’t twins! Hey, I’m just tryin’ ‘a help ya out! You ain’t twins.
Female twins: [silence]
Male twins: I’m just tryin’ a help you out! I have your best interest in mind! You ain’t twins! Look! That one’s that one’s mother!
Female twins: We’re twins. We are the same age.
Male twins: Then how come that one so much older than the other? You ain’t twins! We twins! That’s why we so tall! We the twin towers! Female twins flee train. –F train

It’s All Greek to Me

Businessguy: It’s a small world.
Businesschick: Especially in Astoria!
Businessguy: Ha, ha, ha!
Businesschick: Hee, hee. –Midtown office

Flying a Plane Into Something Is Always the Answer

Male office drone #1: So what do you think of them building a mosque by the World Trade Center?
Female office drone #1: I feel it's disrespectful. I have Muslim friends and I know they're not all terrorists, but there's mourning families to think about.
Male office drone #2: Why don't we put a statue of Hitler in Times Square? There might be some Germans who would want to pray to him.
Female office drone #2: Let them put up a mosque there and then fly a plane into it. Show them how it feels. (others look shocked) Not a manned plane, you know. One of those drones.

–Dunkin' Donuts, Lower Broadway

Overheard by: Big Larry