Woman: I really hope that you start doing some shit that’s smart. –Broadway & Waverly Businessman: The CEO’s a good ol’ Italian goombah from Bayonne. –Midtown Office
Guido on phone: C'mon! Me and Shannon want someone to drink with tonight!
Girl with heavy black eyeliner: Yeah! I love alcohol!
(they high five)
–A&W, Staten Island
Overheard by: Brandi, Anna and Kim
Guido: I like my women a little more, shall we say, feminine.
Trannie: Yeah, I’ve got balls.
–LIRR, 6 AM
Overheard by: eileen
Guido #1: I fucking hate New Jersey.
Guido #2: I won't even take a piss in New Jersey.
Guido #1: I won't even say “New Jersey”!
A guido is wearing a black jumpsuit and hat when a middle aged woman approaches him.
Woman: Hey…cowboy hat, eh?
Guido: (tips hat) You got that right.
Woman: And is that…velour too, huh?
Guido: You bet. Only the finest.
Woman: Don’t even tell me. You wearing a g-string under that?
Guido: Actually, how did you know? –MSG Overheard by: Jay G
Guido #1, in drunken sing-songy voice: Yan-kees suuuuck! Yan-kees suuuuck!
Guido #2: They win a lot!
–Train, Penn Station
Overheard by: jalabi99
Guido in car with Jersey plates: Don't touch my penis!
Gay man on the street: We don't want your penis, bitch!
–8th Ave & 22nd St
Overheard by: Adam and AnnMarie
Guido #1: Yo, your team hasn't won a playoff in ten years. Maybe not this year, but the Jets are going all the way to the Super Bowl.
Guido #2: Yeah, and if my aunt had balls she'd be my uncle. (pause) If my aunt had balls, she'd be my uncle.
Overheard by: DZB
Guido #1: Yo, girl, wassup, wassup?
Pretty Asian girl, walking briskly: I don't want your services.
Guido #1: I don't got no services. Whachu talkin bout, services? Psh!
Guido #2: Yo, you would service her.
Guido #1: Yeah, bro, I would totally service her!
–22nd St & Broadway
Overheard by: Ilikecandy
20-something girl: We need to get cards so we can play Kings.
20-something guy: Yeah, Kings!
Guido, passing by: Cards? I'll astonish you with my tricks.
–79th St & Amsterdam