Archive for the ‘Handicaps’ Category

Wednesday One-Liners Lay the Smack Down

Big guy on phone: … All I’m sayin’ is that’s wrong, man — you hit an ol’ woman, and you’re a boxer! –151st & Amsterdam Overheard by: Thin walls Guy on cell: So, wait — you punched her or slapped her? In the face?! Oh. Ow… Yeah, that’s still not appropriate. –N 6th St, Brooklyn Overheard by: j Angry guy on cell: This guy laid a fucking warrant on me for beating up crackheads! –168th & Fort Washington Ave Overheard by: RR Five-year-old girl to seven-year-old brother: I’ll punch your Adam’s apple straight down your throat! –Graham Ave bus station Black girl on rising escalator, to friend: If he says anything to me, I’m gonna kick him in the ding-ding and then run! –Broadway East station Overheard by: Subwaysurfer

People Who Shouldn't Go to Japan

Average Joe: Short people are insufferable!
Shorter friend: Tell me about it! –Bleecker St & Carmine St Overheard by: Lezbotron Headline by: Jane Runners-Up:
· “…And They Have Limited Vocabularies and Will Agree With Anything” – Bob
· “I Thought I Just Did.” – Katie
· “That Scene From “The Wizard Of Oz” Was Like Hell on Earth!” – space coyote
· “To Be Fair, He Did Reply in That High-Pitched Cackle” – Kenneth
· “Tom Cruise Is Refreshingly Self-Aware” – Meg
Click here to see the new Headline Contest