Archive for the ‘Harassment’ Category

Show Me the Wednesday One-Liners!

Angry teen on cell: I'm not gonna pay 18 dollars for a wedgie! –Lingerie Department, Macy's Overheard by: me neither Girl on cell: I don't have a problem with camping, but why do they have to give me a sleeping bag? Can't they give me linens? It's not like I'm not giving them an insignificant amount of money. –W Broadway & Grand Suit on cell: At first I was only making $30,000 a year, but last year I got shot in the foot, and then I got a $1,000 bonus, so now I'm making $32,000 a year. Shit! –F Train Overheard by: Brittany Smith Loud woman on cell: I like and don't mind fucking you, but I need to get paid. I'm unemployed right now. –108th & Broadway Elevator operator for observatory, upon leaving: Please come again! We want your money. –Empire State Building Old guy in dark suit to young guy in dark suit: You're not embezzling money! –48th & 8th

…Um, I've Heard That Works Really Well.

Teenager #1: Aw, that guy was so cute! He'd better be there when I go return my skates.
Teenager #2: You should find out his number or something.
Teenager #1: Nah, that's too awkward.
Teenager #2: Just ask his name from one of the other workers, and say you wanna report him to the manager… But then really just stalk him on Facebook! –Ice Skating Rink, Bryant Park Overheard by: lol

Wednesday One-Liners Would Shoot Jodie Foster to Impress You

Girl on cell: You have a mini what? Stalker? (pause) Do you mean "mini" like a little person? Or like only partial stalking? –Park Ave & 77th St Woman to friend: No wonder that guy is stalking you! You told him everywhere you were going! –Astor Place Overheard by: sarah Suit on cell: Yeah, yeah, hold on a minute. I gotta cross the street to stalk this girl. –Times Square Overheard by: creeped out Mother to daughter, indignantly: No, it's not stalking! It's called being resourceful. –16th St & 9th Ave

NewsFlash: Crackhead Slain on 2 Train! Film at Eleven.

Crackhead to white girl: I want a little white girl. Okay, a little white lily, she so mad, I want a little white girl, not a black girl, they broke my heart too many times. You think I'm harassing you because you're white and I'm black.
Girl on train: I'm not white, okay? I'm not white, stop looking at me. I don't look remotely white, or Caucasian.
Crackhead: I'm not into fat girls, so I'll look somewhere else. I'm not into fat jokes, just black jokes. You probably think I'm into white guys, not white girls, just call me gay. Are you trying to slip away?
Girl on train: Did he just call me fat? –Downtown 2 Train

Wait a Minute– Are You the Creepy Guy?

Annoyed woman: And then there's that one guy, that creepy guy who's always harassing me.
Confused man: Who?
Annoyed woman: That guy, he's really pale.
Confused man: Oh, is this the albino guy?
Annoyed: No, no, the albino guy is cool. It's that film student.
Confused man: The guy who works at Anderson's?
Annoyed woman: No, that's the other one. He's all right, that guy's all right. –R Train Overheard by: Hannah