Archive for the ‘Hard Drugs’ Category

Son Of a Wednesday One-Liner Man

Evangelist outside gym: You want to be a macho man? Look at Jesus! –Broadway & Prince Street evangelist on microphone: Y'all ever see two female pigeons in bed together? –Fordham Plaza Very agitated priest: Jesus was a zygote once–what if Mary aborted him? –St. Luke's Church, Whitestone Crazy subway evangelist: If god could make me a good crackhead, you best believe he could make me a good preacher. –E Train Overheard by: Giggling at crack Preacher: And that's why your religion is null and void. –Union Square Overheard by: Alfie

Isn’t It Time You Talked to Your Kids About Wednesday One-Liners?

Creepster: Hey there… do you like drugs? … How about Gandhi? –Chambers &and West Broadway Girl on cell: So I opened the envelope on the train… Yeah it was heroin. –W 46th Ave Bum: Excuse me! Hey, hey! Excuse me! Check it out! I am going to smoke crack all fucking night, and there isn’t anything anyone can do about it, because that’s what I’m going to do, I’m going to smoke so much crack! –West 4th at Washington Square Park Overheard by: Cory Guy to hungover girl: Everyday you look more and more like you do heroin. –Relish Bar & Grill Preppy dude: I like doing drugs too much to be a Buddhist. –Arlene’s Grocery Mom to ten-year-old son: … But that’s like saying heroin is the only drug to try! –14th St & 9th Ave

Anyone Else Wish He'd Just Smoke the Crack Already?

Baseball fan #1: Oh, I'm going to get laid tonight.
Baseball fan #2: Are you going to call Alice?
Baseball fan #1: Oh no, you don't understand my life, man! I've got this girl who just sits on a milk crate and sucks my cock!
Baseball fan #2: Dude!
Baseball fan #2: Where does she do this? On a crate? What?
Baseball fan #1: You don't understand my life, man! She just does it wherever! I'm literally ready to smoke crack at any minute!
Baseball fan #2: Man, we don't want to know.
Baseball fan #1: I'm ready to smoke crack at any minute! You just can't control these things. –Yankee Stadium Overheard by: simon

WednesDEA One-Liners

Loud guy: Hey! Illegal drugs, anyone? Illegal drugs? I want to buy some illegal drugs! –6th Ave & 34h St Overheard by: Emily College girl to friend: Remember that time when you slept with that drug trafficker? –33rd & 3rd Man in restaurant: After the roofies I took I was a total mess, it was amazing. –23rd & 10th Overheard by: Matt Man to friend holding Diet Coke: Do you remember when they had this at that gay bathhouse I had to go to because my drug dealer was there? –Duane Reade Dude, about crowd: I'm so glad we dropped acid before coming here. –Trader Joe's, Union Square Overheard by: Kat Loud girl on cell: She can't just call you up and like, reminisce and be like, "remember when we loved each other?" Oh, and I don't even want to talk about the conversation we had this morning. There's no excuse to do acid! –Wagner College