Archive for the ‘Health and Hygiene’ Category

It’s Funny ’til Somebody Breaks Their Wednesday One-Liner

Guy on slippery sidewalk: Man, I can’t wait! I can’t wait to see somebody bust their ass, yo. –86th & Broadway Conductor: To the passenger in the first car transporting a ladder, please make sure you have control of your ladder, and please don’t knock anybody in the noggin. To all other passengers riding in the first car, please be prepared to duck. –6 train Guy on cell: I sliced my thumb with a box cutter, but they told me the only guy who could get workman’s comp for that injury is Roger Ebert. –4 train Blonde teen: So, like, what does someone do if they break their leg or something on Christmas? Because the hospital’s closed on Christmas… –8th & Broadway Blonde, tapping shoulder of kid on crutches crossing street: Tag, you’re it! –Astor Pl Overheard by: Kyle

This Is Not a Hard Problem

50-something yuppie guy to another: My wife just doesn't understand that men go through menopause too. It's not just a woman's problem. These past few months I can tell that I've begun my menopause.
Teenage girl sitting across from two yuppies: I'm pretty sure they call what you're going through “erectile dysfunction.” –F Train Overheard by: Sophia