Drunk: Where’s my boy, man? –Odessa, Ave. A
Archive for the ‘Homeless’ Category
Let’s Pluck Him and Stuff Our Coats
Businesswoman: It’s mighty ducky today.
Hobo: Quack!
–Wall Street
NY’s Homeless Speak on the Issues
A hobo stumbles into the store, yelling things and making everyone uncomfortable. Suddenly, he stumbles upon the rack with copies of the New York Times, an image of Iraq on the front page. He stares in silence for a moment, and says: You think it’s bad being homeless? Imagine being in Fallujah! –Starbucks, 59 St. & 9th Ave. Overheard by: Andrea Two hobos are drinking malt liquor from paper bags. Hobo #1 shakes his head in dismay: …I tell you, I tell you–that’s why they’ll [sic] never be peace in the Middle East. –29th St. & 2nd Ave. Overheard by: Tricia Karsay
Race + Power = Racism, Kevin Claims
Hobo: Excuse me peoples, but can I get a dime or quarter?
College Student: Sorry, I can’t help you sir.
Hobo: Thanks a lot, whitey!
–161st Street, The Bronx
Overheard by: Peter Whalen
A Homeless Miss Manners
Vagrant: Can you help a homeless man get something to eat? Huh? Ma’am? Did you say no? I can’t hear you!
Chinese Lady: No.
Vagrant: She said no! People, let me hear you!
–6 Train
Trick or Treat with the Homeless
Hobo: …damn, this is some fucked up shit. Most fucked up shit I’ve ever seen. Motherfucker arguin’ with himself. Who argues with himself? Man, this is some fucked up shit… –West Village Overheard by: Matt Muscari
Then Why Am I Laughing So Hard?
Homeless Advocate: A penny for the homeless! A penny is all we ask. Everyone is ignoring me over a penny. Don’t laugh at me. It’s not funny. –Times Square
A Book About You
Yuppie #1: I really want a drink
Drunk Homeless man (to Yuppie #2): What are you reading?
Yuppie #2: I’m reading a book on sobriety.
Drunk Homeless man (looking over her shoulder): Oh
Yuppie #2: Yes, it’s also about drug additions..valium, etc.
Drunk Homeless man: Really that’s interesting
– Union Square Park
…Yet
Cracked-out hobo, watching crazy hobo yelling in the distance: What the hell is his problem?
Bag lady: I don't know, must be on some drugs or suttin'. Damn, I'm so glad we not like that!
–St. Mark's
Overheard by: Ilikecandy
Biblically?
White man selling stories: You wanna hear a story?
20-something white guy: What's it about?
White man selling stories: It's about a pirate, his parrot, and cyborgs.
20-something white guy: Okay.
White man selling stories: First, are you familiar with robots?
–Brooklyn Bridge
Overheard by: Human Being