Patron: What kind of sauce is on the linguine alla marinara? –Olive Garden, Chelsea Overheard by: Brad Palmertree
Idiot: You speak European as well?
Chick: I speak… uh… I don’t know what I speak. –East Village Overheard by: Nico Westerdale
Hipster chick: Ugh, dolls. Dolls are so creepy. I’m never letting my kid have a doll. Drugs, yes. Dolls, no. –UES
Chick: Who’s he talking about?
Guy: Family Guy.
Chick: Oh, I hate that guy. –Bensonhurst
Woman: Do you have a non-fiction section?
Book guy: Well, everything that’s not fiction is non-fiction. [Over] there’s cooking, and there’s history.
Woman: No, that’s not what I asked. Do you have a section for non-fiction?
Book guy: Well, there are no non-fiction novels. Everything here that’s not a novel is non-fiction.
Woman: But you don’t have a non-fiction section?
Book guy: No. Everything that isn’t fiction is non-fiction.
–Barnes & Noble, Staten Island
Overheard by: Dr. Ballon
Drunk Skank #1: …cause that’s what we’re celebrating.
Drunk Skank #2: What’re we celebrating?
Drunk Skank #1: The Bush/Cheney thing.
Drunk Skank #2: Oh yeah! –49th and Broadway Overheard by: Anne C.
Teenage guy: Dude, I just coughed up a little speck of blood. Do you think I could have another cigarette or is that a bad idea? –68th & Amsterdam Overheard by: Cully
Guy: Of course I’ve drank kerosene. But it wasn’t like I used a cup, though. I used a siphon. –Astoria Overheard by: Stephie Russell
Customer: A hot coffee, please.
–Starbucks, 28th & 3rd
A man hands a woman a brochure for erectile dysfunction. Man: I’m not only the president, I’m also a client. –MetroNorth Train Overheard by: Mark