Archive for the ‘Japanese’ Category

Comic Books May Have Given You Some Unrealistic Expectations

Japanese student/tourist seemingly waiting for luggage: How long are you in New York for?
Woman waiting for luggage: Just for one night. I'm here for a conference and then I'm flying back tomorrow.
Japanese student/tourist: This is my fall break. I will be here through Tuesday.
Woman: That's nice. I hope you go out and have a nice time.
Japanese student/tourist: Yes. (pause) Sex.

–JFK Airport

Dead or Alive’s Subliminal Messages Finally Kick In

American guy #1: Remember when you were here last year, and Mike was spinning you around, and dropped you on your head?
Japanese girl: What?
American guy #2: Last year! In New York! You were here! I took your legs and went like this! I dropped you on your head!
Japanese girl: Yes! Yes! Ha, ha, ha, ha!
American guy #1: Dude, she loves it! Most girls, if you dropped them on their heads, would be like, “Fuck you, I’m never talking to you again.” –C train

Some NYC History, Overheard Style

Slacker #1: You know that ships used to come up the river and dock in the West Village?
Slacker #2: Really, man?
Slacker #1: Yeah, really. They used to let the sailors out there…yeah, that’s where the term “Hey Sailor” came from. –Prince Street laundromat Japanese girl: If this is New York, where are Old York?
Japanese Dad: I think that is in England. –59th & 6th Overheard by: Svein Brunstad

How Many Weight Watchers Points Are in a Wednesday One-Liner?

Average-sized woman on cell: He said "big boned." Yeah, "you're a big boned girl… Like your dad, kinda big boned." (pause) Yeah, so, I didn't really feel like eating much after that.

–Queens

Overheard by: bdlilrbt

Girl to friend: I always think I'm a thin person, but then I look into the mirror and realize I'm not.

–3rd & 13th

Super skinny Japanese girl: I brought my juice with me. Then I ordered dessert. But my juice just looked better than eating dessert.

–Downtown 1 Train

Overheard by: dignell

Middle aged women to friend: Yeah, we took her in for a few weeks. She was fine, but didn't eat much. But that's because she kind of has an eating disorder. (they burst out into a fit of laughter)

–F Train

Girl getting soda to friend: You know, it's the ice that makes you fat. I heard that somewhere.

–Cafeteria, Marymount Manhattan

Overheard by: Hannah

‘Cause If You Do Like Torture, My Culture Is All Over That

D.O.M.: I really like your culture.
Cute Japanese bartender: You… like torture?
D.O.M.: What? No, no… Culture — culture….
Bartender: [Silence.]
D.O.M.: Culture. Man, how do I say this…?
Bartender: [Silence.]
D.O.M.: … I like what you guys do.
Bartender, leery: Thanks…

–Japanese restaurant

Overheard by: aulevan