Overheard In New York

Archive for the ‘Knock-Offs’ Category

Because That’s Just a Sexual Thing

Woman #1: He’s kinda funky. He doesn’t bathe a lot.
Woman #2: Really?
Woman #1: Yeah, he’s an artist. Like, he wears lederhosen… Maybe that’s a bad example.

–New Pasteur Restaurant

Overheard by: Shawn

Hates Any Group Whose Stereotype Is Smarter Than Her Own

NYC woman: We’re here!
Southern tourist bimbo: Laura, I thought we were here to get cheap fake purses?
NYC woman: We are — this is Chinatown.
Southern tourist bimbo: Why are there so many Chinese people?
NYC woman, slowly: This is Chinatown…
Southern tourist bimbo: Laura! You know I hate Chinese people!

–Canal St

Overheard by: The Wizard

It’s Why I Wear It

Little girl: Oooh, furry! Mommy, can I pet the pretty, furry lady?
Old lady wearing a pink fur: Don’t worry, I get this all the time.

–47th & 5th

Overheard by: Micaela

Those who Bootleg History Are Doomed to Profit From It

20-something Chinese guy: You know what? Chinese people discovered America.
20-something Black guy: Bullshit.
20-something Chinese guy: It’s true! There’s an article on CNN showing we discovered America, there are maps. Chinese were here first before everyone else. Chinese people did everything before everyone else. White people take credit for everything, but now it’s coming out that Chinese made all of these discoveries first. Don’t you see a pattern? We’re the shit.
20-something Black guy: The only pattern I see is that you motherfuckers pirate and resell every DVD, and now you’re trying to bootleg history.

–Chinatown

Overheard by: Ricky

They Have Chocolate or Bubble Gum

Asian woman: You want Coach, Prada, Louis Vuitton? DVD?
Guy, about to light up: Do you sell fake cigarettes?

–Canal St