Archive for the ‘Latinos’ Category

Wednesday How Many Liners?

Cute guy to German flight attendant on layover: So, do you have cars in Germany? –Barracuda Overheard by: barkeeper Girl: So, my mom is Jewish and my dad is Christian. Does that make me, like, bi-racial? –Eugene Lang College Overheard by: Still ashamed I go to school here Hispanic high school girl: Is the Fourth of July always on a Friday? –N Train Overheard by: D-Law Guy to friend: Well, that's nice, they have these machines set up for the visually impaired, but what about the deaf people? –ATM, 38th St & Madison Ave Overheard by: jennyooooo Student: Is Swedish even a language? –Columbia University Trucker: What are you, stupid, or both? –M86 Crosstown Bus

Wednesdiverse Multi-Liners

Soulful black man: Well, think about this. A white man lived in Graceland, a black man lived in Neverland. (nods knowingly) –Downtown A Train Overheard by: Bearsian Gallery director to intern: So after he was arrested we sent a letter to Henry Gates asking him for money, you know, since we are a multicultural organization. –Lower East Side Art Gallery Latina to Latino: Latinos and black people can't be racist. That's, like, just white people. –Red Hook, Brooklyn White hobo: When I see a black nigger together with a white nigger, that just confuses the hell outta me. –Houston & Clinton Woman: She likes black dogs because she's black, and I like white dogs because I'm white. –Upper West Side Overheard by: Yehuda

They Did It to Confuse You

In a dark movie theater– Black guy standing up in his seat: Yo! I’m right over here, hurry up and get your ass through the aisle.
Hispanic guy: It’s not my problem I can’t see you in the dark, cuz you so black! The only the thing I can see is your white t-shirt, but everybody has white on –Lincoln Center AMC Theater Overheard by: JKim

Hush, Little Wednesday, Don't You One-Liner

Mother to screaming child: Please stop crying and put your coat on. I am not hurting you or torturing you, so please stop crying. –4th Ave, Brooklyn Overheard by: olivejuice Father to kid who just started crying: Hey, stop! I thought I told you to wait until we got home! –Park Slope, Brooklyn Overheard by: Lucian Guy to girl, on Valentine's Day: You look fat when you cry. –Cobble Hill Overheard by: MJB Hispanic man on phone to girlfriend: Ma, why you cryin?! You should be breaking up with me because I hit you! –Staten Island Ferry Guy to girlfriend: I'm sorry I pulled your hair while you were crying. –Bowery & 2nd

Sure, Lisa, Some Magical Wednesday One-Liner….

Dude with chick to group of smokers outside bar: We are going to eat pork chops and fuck. –Bleecker and Crosby Gay male on cell: …Do you really think I would try his sausage balls? –53rd St & 8th Ave Budget Vin Diesel: I love bacon. If I could, I would put bacon in my cereal. –Sunburnt Cow, Avenue C Overheard by: LeahPia77 Hispanic deli worker: Es muy barato, como la carne de gato. –10th & Broadway Overheard by: Anna Pilar Black man, to Jewish friend: You’re not Jewish. You had bacon at your baby’s naming ceremony. Thickest, juiciest most delicious bacon I ever ate in my life. You named your kid Samuel and you had bacon. Delicious, delicious bacon. –A Train Man on cell phone: The sausages! I mean, I don’t feel bad for the hot dogs. But, the sausages?! –41st and 7th Overheard by: Justin

Wednesday One-Liners Prefer to Be Called ‘Caucasian’

Hispanic guy to another, leaving restroom: Man, it smells like white man’s shit in there. –Trump Tower, 5th Ave Hobo to hispanic guy on cell: Are there any white people in this town? –Wyckoff & Troutman, Brooklyn Overheard by: they’re coming Woman: But it’s Aryan night… –116th & Broadway Hobo playing guitar: I’ve got three kids at home — I’ll take anything. I’ll take food stamps, hair weave, Chinese people’s money, change, food, weed… I’ll even take white people’s money. –1 train Overheard by: trooshieb Black lady: Harlem is up and coming, but it ain’t come up yet. I need to see a few more white people jogging at six a.m. before I sign a lease above 125th. –7 train

Isn't It Great That We Can Talk Like This?

Black MTA employee guy: My brother is the conductor on this train.
Hispanic MTA employee woman: Is that right? What's his name?
Black MTA employee guy: I don't know.
Hispanic MTA employee woman: You don't know his name? And he's your brother?
Black MTA employee guy: He's a brother from another mother. You know, kinda light-skinned, with freckles.
Hispanic MTA employee woman: Oh, I know that guy. He hangs out with what's-his-name.
Black MTA employee guy: Yeah, right. –1 Train Overheard by: Stephanie Luke