Girl: I’m, like, the token one. I’m the only lesbo there! –West 4th and 6th Ave Overheard by: Jamie
Lesbian #1: The G train always takes so long between stops, especially since it’s not going in a tunnel.
Lesbian #2: But it does go through a tunnel.
Lesbian #1: Yeah, but I mean a tunnel under water.
Lesbian #2: Oh, yeah, okay, it’s not going under water.
Lesbian #1: I always wondered how they make those tunnels.
Lesbian #2: They have one of those machines, that goes in circles.
Lesbian #1: Oh, okay…
Lesbian #2: You know, the one that goes in circles really quickly?
Lesbian #1: Yeah… [Pause] But when they build the tunnel in the water, does it go in the water, or under the water?
Lesbian #2: Under the water.
Lesbian #1: Oh, right. –G train
Guy: Lady, you got great legs.
Lady: I’m a lesbian!
Guy: Okay, you’re a lesbian who got great legs.
Lady: Oh…well, thanks. –57th & Park Overheard by: Heather
12-year-old girl holding plaid button-down shirt: Wow, I can't wait to be a hipster!
Dyke in similar plaid shirt: When did “dyke” become “hipster”?
Overheard by: Starisla
Lesbian #1, indignantly: So, does this outfit look Michigan to you, huh? Does it?
Lesbian #2: (mumbles)
Lesbian #1: That's what I thought.
–1st Ave & Houston
Overheard by: dignell
Woman in therapy: So I don't know, I really liked her.
Therapist: Well, did you talk to her about it?
Woman: No, the bitch doesn't call me anymore, she does yoga now. We used to go to Star Trek conventions together, but she stopped talking to me. I don't even care about that bitch anymore.
Therapist: You know, she's not a bitch just because she doesn't want to talk to you!
Woman: Yes she is, I don't even care.
Overheard by: They need a sound machine
Lesbian #1: I thought you said your probation officer was out of town this week?
Lesbian #2: My probation officer? My probation officer don't know shit!
–Bleecker & Sullivan
Gay #1: Sometimes, I just wish I was a stripper.
Gay #2: Oh, I would totally go to see you.
Lesbian: Yeah, me too, but only if you can make the mangina.
–Porn Shop, West Village
Overheard by: me too…
Coed: When my nipple-hairs pop up, that means I'm done.
Overheard by: Ladle
Hobo to tiny sexy Asian girl wearing tank top on chilly day: Two nipples for a dime?
–9th Ave & 14th St
Cute gay chick on cell: I am aware that it's pride month, but I still like to keep sharp objects away from my nipples. My gay forefathers did not fight at Stonewall so that I might wear body jewelry.
–4th Ave & 11th St, Brooklyn
Mother to little boy: Those are not meant to be shown in public; nipples are private things.
Overheard by: g-lime
Crazy guy, yelling: When I see my nipples in the mirror, I look away!
Overheard by: Zach Rock Steady
Slutty lesbian chick buying ice cream: So then she says “Scream! I'm going to keep spanking you until you scream!”
Slightly less slutty chick: So what did you do?
Slutty lesbian chick: Well, I wanted it to be hot, but when it came out it wasn't so much an “I'm getting spanked, and it's hot” scream as it was an “I'm shitty and it hurts” grunt.
–Grocery Store, The Bronx