Woman: You know I lie. I lie all the time. But I lie about little things, I don’t lie about big things. That’s a big thing, I wouldn’t lie about that! –Midtown
Man: You know that website called Overheardinnewyork.com?
Woman: No, I haven’t. What is it?
Man: Lame! –Empire State Building
Man on cell: I’ll be in Fort Lauderdale in 2 hours, wait for me. –34th & 8th
Girl: What time is it, 5:30? I’m not even supposed to be out.
Guy: Why not?
Girl: Because I’m in Milan!
–23rd St & Park Ave
Overheard by: Sara
Chick: When Derek Jeter sees where my new bug bites are, he’s going to go ballistic.
–McDonald’s, 51st & 3rd
Overheard by: Jack
Enlightened film student to dense film student: Y’know, I can’t wait for you to wake up one day, sit straight up in bed with your eyes open wide and realize that Quentin Tarantino sucks ass!
Old guy to wife: God, Matthew McConaughey is a fucking faggot. That guy’s been sucking cock since he was born.
–42nd & Broadway
Newspaper peddler: Read all about it! Britney Spears just died! Read all about it!
–Wall St & Broadway
11-year-old girl, leaning on subway pole: I want to jump on this pole like Tila Tequila! She can put her legs up over her head!
–E train, 50th St
Chick: I’m European. Europeans don’t wait on line — this is bull. [Two hours later, to bathroom attendant] Yeah, well, I was born and raised in Queens, so I guess that’s why I’m so outspoken.
Overheard by: Ioulia Fedorova
Fat guy: I love you.
Cute girl: Do you really mean what you say, or are you just saying it?
Fat guy: Of course I mean it. [They make out, then chick leaves.] What a dumb bitch.
Overheard by: Ting
Bimbette: Yeah, me and Beyoncé is friends on MySpace. She invites me to all the hot events, like her concerts and parties. She even bulletins me.
Boyfriend: For real?
Bimbette: Yeah, we’s like best friends.
–Shuttle to Times Square
Overheard by: Is not friends with Beyonce
Middle-school boy: Yeah, you’re a pathological liar.
Middle-school girl: What do you mean? When have I lied to you? I never lie. I only lie to my therapist.
Overheard by: cate
Woman on cell: I’m in the subway station right now. Yeah, I’m in the subway. See you soon.
–Urban Outfitters dressing room, 14th & 6th
Scruffy guy yelling into cell: Listen, man! I told you, I can’t make it. I’m in the middle of traffic in Queens… Yeah! On the fucking BQE!
–Union St & 5th Ave, Park Slope
Overheard by: Grant
Woman on phone: I gotta go — I’m at Weight Watchers.
–Dunkin’ Donuts, Bayside
Overheard by: Sara Swank
Suit on cell: Yo, I’m in Weehawken right now.
–Duane Reade, 34th & 8th
Overheard by: gilmoregirl77
Resident on phone: I am just parking the car now — I should be home in 10 minutes.
–NY Presbyterian, 9th floor
Guy on cell: I’m sick today, I’m not coming in… I just got out of bed. [Cabs honk.] Maybe I’ll get in later…
–Outside Penn Station
Guy on cell: Hi, honey, how are you? I’m just here studying at the library… [Getting flustered] No, when Alex says he’s at the library he’s at the bar. When I say I’m at the library, I’m at the library. You know I don’t lie to you.
–Outside bar patio, Four Faced Liar, W 4th