Literary Agent: I’m full of shit. I can’t help it! –36th Street
Archive for the ‘Lies’ Category
Pants on Fire
Woman: You know I lie. I lie all the time. But I lie about little things, I don’t lie about big things. That’s a big thing, I wouldn’t lie about that! –Midtown
Not Literally, I Hope
Guy: We’re all stuck in a loop of bullshit. –Odessa, Ave. A
Correction: This Site is ALSOME!!!1
Man: You know that website called Overheardinnewyork.com?
Woman: No, I haven’t. What is it?
Man: Lame!
–Empire State Building
“…and by ‘Fort Lauderdale’, I mean ‘Bayside’.”
Man on cell: I’ll be in Fort Lauderdale in 2 hours, wait for me. –34th & 8th
He Meant Auto-fellated
Girl: “Teleported.” That’s what he said.
Boy: What?
Girl: You know, teleporting.
Boy: Oh, okay, yeah.
Girl: He said he teleported himself, but it turned out he was lying!
Boy: Really?
–6 Train
Overheard by: Mary Phillips-Sandy
Actually, a Shirt by Tommy Bahama
Aging woman with poor Botox: I've been all over the world. All over. Every continent, practically.
Friend: Where have you been?
Aging woman with poor Botox: I haven't been to Africa… Asia… I haven't gone to India or Russia… The Middle East… Uh… I've been to Europe a lot.
Friend: Where in Europe?
Aging woman with poor Botox: The Bahamas.
–Bleu, 187th & Fort Washington
Overheard by: RyanK
Biblically?
White man selling stories: You wanna hear a story?
20-something white guy: What's it about?
White man selling stories: It's about a pirate, his parrot, and cyborgs.
20-something white guy: Okay.
White man selling stories: First, are you familiar with robots?
–Brooklyn Bridge
Overheard by: Human Being
Lead-In to the Gay Porno “Doin' It Indian Style”
Indian guy: You better not buy me anything!
Slightly older Indian guy: Okay, I won't buy you anything. C'mon.
Indian guy: Where are we going?
Slightly older Indian: We're going to the dark alley.
Indian guy: The place I really like?
Slightly older Indian : No, the place I really like.
–138th St & Amsterdam Ave
Macbeth: Is This Emily I See Before Me, Her Handle Toward My Hand?
Drunk man: What's your name?
Sober woman: Emily.
Drunk man: Can we talk, Emily?
Sober woman: Sorry, I have to go call my boyfriend.
Drunk man, clutching heart: Dagger! Your name should be “dagger.”
–Coming Out of UWS Bar
Overheard by: That's cold