Rushed New Yorker shoving through tour group: Excuse me, excuse me…
Tour guide: Don't worry, folks, most New Yorkers aren't this rude.
Rushed New Yorker: Screw you! Yes we are, that's what everybody loves about us.
–Bryant Park
Overheard by: I agree
Archive for the ‘Love’ Category
He's a Margaret Chow
Old man, hitting on two Asian girls as his dog walks up to them: Are you Korean?
Asian girls: No.
Old man, about the dog: He loves Koreans.
–Mornigside Park
Overheard by: Chrissy
It Was Either That, or Work the Weekend
Young gay guy, crying: But I love you, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.
Old gay guy: They why did I catch you with Robert*'s dick in your mouth?
Young gay guy: Well, he is my boss…
–Soho Grand Hotel
Money Can't Buy Me Wednesday One-Liner
Girl on cell: And then she said "dammit, I'm in love with a 52-year-old gay man," and I was like "well, who isn't?"
–Astoria
Overheard by: AnotherFagHag
Man on cell: So I told her, "I missed you more than I loved you," but I didn't mean it in a bad way.
–6th Ave & 17th St
Overheard by: memzilla
Black student to black girl sitting next to him: See that's why niggas don't tell bitches they love 'em!
–St. John's University
Overheard by: naha
Thug on cell: No, no. I love your whole ass as issss.
–Broadway & Beaver
Girl to group of friends: Right, I'm so incapable of love because I think sex is gross!
–LIRR
Hot 20-something to another: Either he acts like he doesn't know me, or he is a total asshole. No wonder I'm in love with him.
–Union Square
Not Right Now, Though
Guy, walking toward Broadway: You're the one that I want.
Girl, walking toward 7th Ave: You're the one that I want.
Both, as they continue to walk away: Oo oo oo, honey!
–Times Square
Overheard by: MissPinkKate
…At Least Until Someone Less Awkward Comes Along.
Girl: But I don't want you to feel awkward.
Boy: It's okay. I love you more than feeling awkward.
–South Street Seaport
But That Photo Of Us Topless Could've Been Symbolic!
Chick #1: Our hot bi love is totally on the down-low.
Chick #2: We sent out saucy Christmas cards to all of our friends!
Chick #1: Shit, I totally forgot about that!
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Ladle
White People Flee the Train Before It Gets to Wednesday One-Liners
Sassy black woman: You think I would have brunch in Harlem? I wouldn't even have lunch in Harlem!
–D Train
Overheard by: laughing
Dramatic girl on cell: But I love you. I would go to Harlem and back for you!
–Starbucks
Girl: Wow, Harlem is like a cultural playground. There are stores and everything.
–Metro-North
Columbia freshman girl: I would never let anybody in Harlem touch my vagina.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Meagan
Dude, Kids Would Rather Have the Father Than the Money
40-something man to small toddler: I love you very much, sir.
Toddler: (inaudible gibberish)
40-something man: I will make you very rich, sir.
Toddler: (more inaudible gibberish)
40-something man: When I die you will be very wealthy, sir.
Toddler: (more inaudible gibberish)
40-something man: I will make you so much motherfucking money, sir. You will be so motherfucking rich, sir.
–12th St & Ave B
Overheard by: John
…Up Your Shirt.
Little boy to little girl: I like you.
Little girl: What?
Little boy: I said “I like looking for rocks.”
–Low Plaza, Columbia University