Archive for the ‘Lower East Side’ Category

I Like It Better When They Talk About Starbucks

Guy on cell: OK, well, be safe. If you get raped make sure he wears a condom. –Williamsburg Overheard by: Daniel Girl: Don’t let me talk to boys after I take blue pills. –31st & 2nd Girl #1: Sometimes he like to rape my ass.
Girl #2: Ew! Hee hee. –outside The Brooklyn Museum Overheard by: Josh Neufeld Girl #1: Well, she was raped.
Girl #2: I wasn’t really raped. –Vertigo, 26th & 3rd Yuppie chick #1: Sweetie, you’re going to get raped dressed like that.
Yuppie chick #2: No. I have an umbrella. –Delancey & Allen Overheard by: Mitchell Linetti

Wednesday XXX-Liners

Overly flamboyant gay guy on phone: There is no way he can put himself through law school doing hardcore gay porn!

–Soho

Overheard by: Anastassia

Gay boy to another: Pornstars make good money.

–L Train

Girl: He wants to make money, but all his plans involve me being in porn. You know how long it takes to make a $1000 in porn? Three months!

–Destination Bar, 13th & Ave A

Overheard by: erkala

Heavyset dude to chick watching the Olympics: So I was watching curling porn the other day…

–Lucky Jack's bar, Orchard St.

Overheard by: Ladle

Guy to friend: I saw that girl in a porn video last night. She has a cock.

–William & Cedar

Overheard by: Laura

Tonight on Sexual Tension Theater

Chick #1: I’m telling you, he’s gay! He wouldn’t even make out with me when I, like, threw myself at him!
Chick #2: You needed to see yourself, though. You looked like a mess.
Chick #1: Fuck you, cunt.
Chick #2: I love you.
Chick #1: I tell ya, if anyone ever hung around us they’d commit us both!
Chick #2: Or just you.
Chick #1: I don’t want to be friends anymore.

–Houston & 2nd Ave

And They Make Good Snacks

Lady: Excuse me, can I borrow a light?
Tanktop girl: Sure.
Lady: Thank you so much. [Turns and whispers to guy she’s with:] See, I told you. I think if you’re nice to them, they’re nice to you.
Tanktop girl: Tourists are so cute. –Outside Welcome to the Johnsons, Rivington & Norfolk Overheard by: djlindee