Girl to guy: I don't think that hamsters respond to you as much as, like, a guinea pig does. –Bank St. & Greenwich St. Overheard by: Katie Compa Crazy redneck-looking guy to PETA circus protester: They're gonna do to us what they did to the lions! We'll be put in concentration camps! –Madison Square Garden Overheard by: Santiago and Catie Guy: And she can ride him like a horse! –W 103rd St Graying Brooklyn guy to another: You know, the only thing I haven't seen is a bobcat. –7th Ave & 4th St, Brooklyn Underclassman to another: Lizards can't impregnate anyone. They don't even have penises. –Townsend Harris High School Overheard by: amused Drunk man in tiger costume to McDonald's worker: There's an escaped zoo animal and he wants to eat your pussy. Stop serving your food and hide! (then steals bowl of jams used for breakfast menu) –McDonald's
Child #1, about strong fish smell: Yuck! What’s that smell?
Child #2: I smell freedom! –Ferry near Statue of Liberty Overheard by: Tom Jotkowitz
Three-year-old girl: They got balls!
Three-year-old girl: Yeeeeah! –Globetrotters Game, Madison Square Garden Overheard by: amira
Dude #1: Can I borrow your box cutter?
Dude #2: Oh, ’cause I’m a Puerto Rican I must have a box cutter?
Dude #1: Do you?
Dude #2: Well, yeah. –25th & Broadway Overheard by: Schatzie
Chick #1: I just look for things in my cabinet to overdose on. Seriously, I need to go on strong medication. I have no boyfriend, no life… I need some medicine. I need it right now. Oh my god, I’m about to cry right here. And see, I’m getting so fat. I mean, I still wear the same size and weigh the same, but I’m getting so fat. I know it’s because I’m eating breakfast again. I usually do no breakfast, then yogurt for lunch and fish or something for dinner. I know it’s because of breakfast.
Chick #2: Well, I seriously can’t go home without drinking. It’s not like I’m a huge drinker or anything, but I just can’t stay away from wine once I step in the door. –Madison Square Park Overheard by: Cathy Pyenson
Rich girl to friend: I couldn’t decide between the Marc Jacobs sweater and the Dior jacket. It was like Sophie’s Choice. –Outside NYU dorm Rich lady on phone: Uh-huh, uh-huh, but what if we just put the tennis court where the house was? … Okay, okay, what if we demolish the existing tennis court and make that area the guest house again? Or create a glassed-in structure over the court instead? –Madison Square Garden Overheard by: mkp-hearts-nyc Man lunching with friend: I mean, I never lost a million dollars before. –55th & 6th Ave Overheard by: ilegal browser Dad to child in stroller, passing the park: What? You wanted to go in there? I thought you said you wanted to go to Marc Jacobs. –Hudston St Overheard by: Colleen 20-ish girl: Fuck my dad. How selfish can you be? If I want to live on West 11th, then fucking buy the flat on West 11th. Ugh. Sorry. Can I get another dirty martini? –The Village WASP lady: She’s not even nouveau riche — she is just nouveau! –A Voce, 26th & Madison
Madison Square Garden worker: Sir… Sir! Sir, where the hell do you think you're going?
Man, with five-year-old kid: I'm gettin' in the line for the bathroom.
Madison Square Garden worker: Sir, it looks to me like you're trying to get into the ladies bathroom.
Man: But I got a kid!
Madison Square Garden worker: Did you give birth to your kid?
Madison Square Garden worker: Then it looks to me like you're in the wrong fuckin line. –Madison Square Garden
Black girl to black guy: I saw you with that girl “hahahaing” and “hohoeeing.”
Black guy: Ha ha. –23rd & 5th
Seven-year-old kid #1, playing with spirit stick: Man I feel like I’m five years old again!
Seven-year-old kid #2: Those were the days! –Exiting Madison Square Garden Overheard by: MIchelle
Hobo: Can you spare a quarter?
20-ish guy: I’m broke. I owe the government 70 thousand dollars.
Hobo, after a pause: Would you like a quarter? –Madison Square Garden Overheard by: Jesus Jon