12 year old chick: You see? I told you! This is how the grown-ups dress. –East Village
Archive for the ‘Manhattan’ Category
The Economics of Clubs
Outside a Manhattan club: “Of course we’ll get in. We’re their customers. And of course those girls will get in first — they’re the product!”
Now that’s an education
Young woman at a party in Manhattan: “On the first day, the director of the department introduced us to the writing program and, when he asked us if we had any quesitons, one girl raised her hand and she asked, ‘Where are all the guys?’–that was the first question someone asked! I was so embarrassed.”
…and you’re the next douchebag
Hipster: Man, it’s like…SoHo’s becoming the next Williamsburg. –SoHo
NYC Forecast: Snow, Wind, Heavy Chance of Racism
Girl #1: I hate how my body is cold but my face is freezing off.
Guy: You could wear a ski mask.
Girl #1: But then you look like a douche.
Girl #2: Yeah, like that guy [across the street].
Girl #1: He’s not wearing a ski mask. He’s black.
–26th & 7th
Overheard by: Ricki Lagotte
I Think It’s Called Ballad of the Moron
Hipster #1: I’m really into Bossa Nova.
Hipster #2: I like her, too! What was the name of her hit song? The one that goes [starts humming]
–Yuppietown
The One Sentence Guide to Williamsburg
Indie girl: Defeatism is my Friendster. –2nd Avenue Overheard by: Sparkle Shortz
It’s Pronounced Gonorrhea
Teen girl: Whenever I like a guy I get diarrhea. –8th Ave. & 16th St. Overheard by: Kevin Allan
Insert Bloomberg Joke Here
Lady: Excuse me sir, can I bum a ciga…oh, you’re smoking a joint. –3rd Ave. & 12th Street Overheard by: David H
I’ll Take 36 Inches of Rice, Please
Woman: How’s the paella?
Waitress: It’s good. It comes with clams and the whole nine yards.
–Panchito’s, Macdougal St.