Archive for the ‘Medicine’ Category

That's the Last Time I'll Try Something New, “Just for Kicks.”

Oldish lady #1: So, how have you been?
Oldish lady #2: Well, I just had a horrible experience! People always told me that ultrasounds were worse than childbirth, and I never believed them. You know, I never had children. But really! They were doing an ultrasound and I've never experienced anything more painful in my entire life! And then they couldn't find my gallbladder! It was horrible!

–37 Arts, W 37th St

Overheard by: hunterfosterspitsalot

You'll Be Shitting on Top Of the World

Hot man, in consultative tone: Very underrated how taking a huge dump can improve your day.
Hot woman: Seriously!
Hot man: I have something for you. Something that will change your life. I'm completely serious. Have you ever tried Metamucil?
Hot woman: No.
Hot man: You will take the most massive dumps ever and feel great. It's like weightlifting for your bowels.

–26th & Madison Ave

Do Go On…

Hipster Dude: That reminds me of the invention of penicillin.
Hipster Chick: Uh huh.
Hipster Dude: You see they discovered penicillin when they observed…
Hipster Chick: Uh huh. –Ave A and 6th St. Overheard by: Cityrag.com

These Wednesday One-Liners May Be Difficult to Swallow.

30-something on cell: What can I say, the only thing that I can commit to is Percocet.

–63rd & Amsterdam Ave

Suit: Yeah, I didn't even take any Adderall this morning, and I feel fine!

–Wall Street

Girl, casually: I took a few too many Xanax earlier and now I feel like I'm driving my body…

–Cooper Union Foundation Building

Girl on phone: Fine, sniff your lavender, but I still think pills are better.

–52nd & 10th

Overheard by: krysta