Archive for the ‘Metrosexuals’ Category

Dirty Wednesday One-Linering

Tired thug teen, wistfully: I'd dance like crazy in a basement. –R Train Overheard by: Jon A. Two-year-old boy, pointing at three-month old baby: Isn't that guy in my dance class? –Red Hook, Brooklyn Overheard by: Swimfan Clueless man to friend: What do you call male ballerinas anyway? Ballers? –Cirque du Soleil Show, Randall's Island Overheard by: TheGreenCat Girl to friend: I didn't dance with him at all…I kept walking away from him…I wasn't actually a very good prom date. –Bronx Zoo Overheard by: wink Metrosexual on cell: Do you have a large table in your apartment? Is it large enough for five men to stand on? Of course, we won't be dancing! –Upper West Side

Wednesday One-Liners, Now With Delicious Credit Crunch!

Hobo, yelling to crowd: The stimulus plan won't work! The banks have no money! We need to stimulate the banks! You know how? Cocaine and hookers! –53rd st & 5th Ave Overheard by: Andrew Professor: I knew the economy was bad when I saw Saks had layaway. Layaway is for Wal-Mart, not Saks! –NYU Law Guy on phone with mother: No, mom! I'm not going to walk on Wall St today. (pause) Because I don't feel like getting hit by a falling body, that's why. –Broadway & John St Asian metrosexual to friend entering clothing store: No, I wanna stimulate the economy! –SoHo Overheard by: Galatea Cute young professional: I better be able to go into a bar and say, "I have a job, and it's recession proof. Wanna see what my bed and a Magnum condom look like?" –72nd & Broadway Overheard by: Lindsay D. Guy on cell: I'm telling you, when a place like that switches from Charmin to Duane Reade toilet paper, you know the economy is in the shitter. –Great Jones & Broadway