Archive for the ‘Moms’ Category

Only for Catholics

Teen: That guy is jerkin’ it right there in public!
Mother: Look away. He just has a disease.
Teen: What? So chronic masturbation is a disease now?

–42nd St subway

Overheard by: come again?

Headline by: gerard

Runners-Up:
· “Cause Dad Said Its a Cure for Fat Wife Syndrome” – angelica cayne

· “Come Again?” – Mary Beth
· “Ironically, NOT Healed by Laying on Of Hands” – JohnnyB
· “Momma Don’t Know Jack.” – jason daniel
· “No. I Was Referring To The Pus Pockets On The Head Of His Penis.” – Redneck Jedi
· “There’s Even a 12 Stroke Program” – Grantakerous
· “We’re Tivoing _That_ Telethon!” – Vera Vaughan Hough


Click here to see the new Headline Contest

Hard to Imagine Heaven without Cheese

Mother: Shit, girl. You ain’t getting no more cheese for the rest of eternity if I got anything to do with it.
Young girl, crying: I hope I die.
Mother: Well, when you die, heaven help you, they know you lactose intolerant up there, too. So no funny stuff, understand?

–B63 bus, Park Slope

Overheard by: John Proctor