Archive for the ‘Movie Theaters’ Category

Omg, Like W.O.L.s, Lolcatz!

Girl to another, loudly: Oh my god! Where the fuck were you this morning? I was about to text you, but I realized you couldn't text. And I couldn't text either! And you wouldn't pick up your phone! And I needed to talk to you! But I couldn't reach you! So I just like fucking sat there and screamed for ten minutes! –B9 Bus 20-something male to friend: I am so MIA right now. I am MIA. Like, I text you, but I am MIA. Like, so many people send texts to me, and I'm just MIA. –Downtown 6 Train Overheard by: dallas Girl leaving movie: Well, I'm sure she'll send out a mass text the second she has her baby. –AMC Theater 19th & Broadway Overheard by: Julie 20-something to another: Tiffany, I know I left Jason at the altar…but why didn't he text me back? –1849 Bar, MacDougal & Bleecker Laughing hobo to another: That is the funniest joke I've ever heard! You have to text that to me! –St. Mark's Church, 2nd Ave & 9th St Overheard by: cody

Wednesday One-Liners for Black History Month

Russian woman to Russian friend: I want to see Notorious because it's about black people. –Regal Cinema, 13th & Broadway High school boy: Hey, look–a black kid! –B1 Bus Overheard by: Robert Gleyberman Black guy: Don't worry, its alright! I'm not that black! I haven't mugged anybody in two weeks, and I love all white people under six feet tall! –Time Square Overheard by: Jennie Middle-aged black woman, to no one in particular: That George W. Bush! He walks like an arrogant black man! –Queens Overheard by: BigFatTiger Nerdy Jewish guy: I don't know what went wrong. I should be a black girl by now! –Queens College

Meet the Only Guy in the U.S. Who Liked Nights in Rodanthe

Girlfriend to boyfriend walking out of movie theater: That was kinda lame… I totally saw that ending coming.
Boyfriend: I don't know, I kind of liked it.
Girlfriend, raising voice: What do you mean you liked it?
Boyfriend: It was entertaining.
Girlfriend: Oh, so now you're gonna tell me that you liked it more than Sherlock Holmes?
Boyfriend: Actually, yeah…
Girlfriend, angry and yelling: What the fuck? What is wrong with you? I can't believe this! –Outside Chelsea Clearview Cinema Overheard by: J Wing

The Bell Tolls for Wednesday One-Liners

Chick on cell: I hope you fucking die! Die! … Well, not like now… but someday… like, when you’re eighty.. Okay, eighty-four. –NYU Overheard by: Kelly Student: … And I was all, ‘Dude, don’t touch my side of the cadaver!’ –Albert Einstein College of Medicine Overheard by: BuddyblueJD 15-year-old: Look! They’re dying because they suck! —The Bucket List showing, AMC Empire 25 20-ish chick: After I died, I hardly did anything. –45th & 3rd Overheard by: mkr Blonde to gal pals, on Heath Ledger: It just made me realize how real death is when even a celebrity can die! –25th & 1st

If This Conversation Goes on for Much Longer, There Definitely Isn't a God.

Boy, after watching An Inconvenient Truth: Do you believe in god?
Girl: I believe in mother nature.
Boy: You don't believe in god?
Girl: I mean, I do… But I believe this is happening because of nature.
Boy: But you believe in her?
Girl: What?
Boy: Mother nature?
Girl: Mother nature is not like a person… It's just a saying for nature.
Boy: Wait… What? Oh… (pause) I thought she was like a tree or something. –Regal Cinema, Union Square Overheard by: Noeman Samdani