Archive for the ‘Myspace’ Category

Wireless Wednesday One-Liners

Aspiring hipster: All I need now is a tattoo and a MySpace and I’ll be set!

–Oustide Around the Clock, 9th St & 3rd Ave

Overheard by: Molly

Blonde girl: Does anyone know if the subway has wireless connection?

–1 train

Girl on cell: Well, would you fix my computer for free? … What is it with guys who fix my computer wanting to be paid in sexual favors? You’re like the fourth guy to say that to me this year.

–Penn Station

Overheard by: Vicksburg

Lady on cell: Well, have you asked him to close his MySpace account? Well, if he really loved you, he would close it!

–28th St, between Madison & Park

Overheard by: mommamoose

Teen chick on cell: Yeah, it’s funny… Google it. Wait, do you guys even have Google in Florida?

–54th & Park

Overheard by: floridian passerby

Teen chick: Oh my god! I am so putting that on the internet!

–Times Square

Wednesday One-Liners Send Mixed Signals

Man: But they’ll talk to us! That’s the problem with calling people — they talk to you!

–Union Square Park

Chick: For one thing, this guy sounds totally sick and perverted; and, for another, what’s his number?

–Party, 140th & Broadway

Overheard by: Mr. P.

Girl on cell: He was like, ‘Thanks for doing that in a text,’ and I was like, ‘Thanks for saying that in an IM.’

–Park Ave & Union Square North

Collegiate on cell: Dude, why the hell are you calling me? I told you, just use MySpace.

–Park Ave South & 19th St

Queer looking at ringing cell: Shit! [Answers phone in pleasant voice] Hi, Andrew!

–11th St & University

Overheard by: Colleen

Wednesday One-Liners Are Friends With Tom

Geeky boy: I think I’m having trouble meeting people online because my MySpace page is so intimidating.
Goth girls: [Silence.]

–Eileen’s Cheesecake

Girl: Hey, why didn’t you Friendster me on MySpace yet?

–46th & 6th

Overheard by: Duncan Pflaster

Girl departing with friend: MySpace-message me when you get your new phone! But I’m sure I’ll see you before then.

–Hunter College

Overheard by: acep

Nerd: So I broke up with her by changing my MySpace status from ‘In a relationship’ to ‘Single.’

–Starbucks, Astor Place

Overheard by: Adrienne

Ghetto boy: Where the fuck has he been? Fuck. I’m going to hunt that nigger down on MySpace.

–Wendy’s, 23rd St

Guido in car full of guidos, taking girl’s picture with cell: Hey, girl! Didn’t I see you on MySpace last night?

–Hughes Ave & Fordham Rd

Overheard by: Greg

Skinny girl on cell: What? I’m sorry! Listen, you asked! That’s what happens when you bend over and you aren’t wearing underwear: your pussy definitely ends up on MySpace.

–65th & Lex

Too Many Viewings Of ‘Ringu’

8-year-old-kid #1: Hey, do you guys have a page on MySpace?
8-year-old-kid #2: Naw, I’ve never been to MySpace.
8-year-old-kid #3: Yeah, that’s how kids die! They go to MySpace and they die!

–Riverside Park

Overheard by: Emily Jean

Remember That Hipster who Referred to MySpace as ‘Friendster but for Artists’?

Hispanic teen #1: Oh my God girl! You’re such a fucking bitch!
Hispanic teen #2: Pshaa… Nigga please, I got like 300 friends on MySpace and you only got like 100, bitch.
Hispanic teen #1: At least I didn’t sleep with all my 300 friends.
Hispanic teen #2: You are so off my top 14.
Hispanic teen #1: You aren’t even on mine, so I dont give a shit.
Hispanic teen #2: Bitch

–Union Square

Overheard by: Bryan