Queer suit #1: Wow. That was good.
Queer suit #2: Yeah. You were screaming so loud I had to put the pillow over your face.
–19th & 7th
Overheard by: Dan
Archive for the ‘Nostalgia’ Category
Uncle Wiggly Found His Daughter’s Attitude Hard to Understand
Dad riding bicycle with young daughter in child seat: … And I used to think about my rabbit every day!
Daughter, incredulously: Are you insane?!
–5th & 6th, Park Slope, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Doc
Let’s Not Introduce the Spouses, Okay?
50-year-old man: God, I haven’t see you since we were, what, 21?
50-year-old woman: What was it, 1980? Somewhere around there?
50-year-old man: Remember that Frank Zappa concert we went to at Stonybrook in 1978?
50-year-old woman: Yeah, and who got you those front row seats, motherfucker? Me! I stood on line for 24 hours so I could be the first in line for tickets.
50-year-old man: Remember he pulled you up on stage to sing with him?
50-year-old woman: Sure!
50-year-old man: Well, I have a recording of that. I had a little tape recorder in my pocket and I taped the whole show.
50-year-old woman: You’re gonna make a copy of that tape, aren’t you? I gave you your very first blowjob, remember?
50-year-old man: Believe me, I remember it in every exquisite detail. Yeah, that’s worth a copy of a tape.
–Sardi’s
Overheard by: Big Larry
Here’s Binky to Explain
Old lady with dog in stroller: I’ve met you before.
Old lady with three dogs on a leash: Oh, really? Where?
Old lady with dog in stroller: You were at the nail shop. You asked me about my unitard.
–Christopher & Bleecker
Always an Issue with Arm’s-Length Relationships
Asian queer, looking over his shoulder: I think I jerked him off.
Italian queer: Who?
Asian queer: That guy in the green shirt… It’s pretty bad when you can’t keep track of all the people you’ve jerked off.
–Union Square
But the Source of Some Great Cheese
Drunk guy #1: Yo, how funny was that when I told him, ‘Dude, just stick your balls in her mouth’? Remember that?
Drunk guy #2: Ewww, man, his balls are disgusting!
–LIRR
Overheard by: mrbojangles
When Some Ruffian Stole My Pocket Protector
Professor, as student’s phone rings in class: Wow, that was loud. What band is that by?
Student: Well, I don’t remember what the song is called, but it’s by Panic! at the Disco.
Professor: Hmmm… I once panicked at the disco…
–Fordham University
Overheard by: Sromeo
I Liked the Music, but Not the Sodomy
Boyfriend: I used to really love South Pacific.
Girlfriend: Of course you did.
Boyfriend: I think I used to be gay when I was little.
–Manhattan-bound N train
Just Don’t Try to Fill Them Up With Dirt
Bimbette daughter: So, you like, had to, like, grow corn and shit when you were little?
Old hippie father: Yeah, before I moved to Oregon. We had cows.
Bimbette daughter: Ewww! You had to milk cows?
Old hippie father: Yeah, but cows don’t help with household chores, though. Only crocodiles can do that.
Bimbette daughter: Word.
–Barnes & Noble
Before That, There Were Mad Talking Toys, Son
Teen thug: Yo, I remember all that shit from back in the day. Like, in second grade there was this movie with a bug in it…!
Preteen thug: Word?
–42nd St-bound Q train