Archive for the ‘Nudity’ Category

Who Wears the Pants in Your Wednesday One-Liners?

Older man: If you drank a thousand gallons of beer, and then took off your pants…

–79th & West End

Girl to guy with beavers on pants: Excuse me, are those beavers on your pants?

–6 Train

20-something preppy girl on cell: Whenever I'm cheating on my boyfriend, I take off my pants and pretend to be an albino bunny.

–Central Park

Overheard by: that one girl

Guy on cell: If I don't get in her pants tonight, I'm gonna fuck you up!

–1st Ave

Aging drag queen to friend: It's much better than sick obsessions with blond males between the ages of 18 and 25 who always take their pants off to play GameCube.

–The Village

Overheard by: Amused NYU Tischie

God, I Envy Her!

Girl: And she was like “I usually only play the nice girls, so I'm excited to play someone sinister.”
Gay guy, laughing out loud: Did she actually say that? I hate her!
Girl: I know, right? And she has no butt, either! It's just like, flat. What would that look like? Not that anyone should have to imagine her naked.
Gay guy: It's like…a cube. (both laugh)

–Metro North

Wednesday and the World One-Liners With You, Cry and You Cry Alone

Girl, loudly and enthusiastically: Everything I say is a joke!

–City Bakery, 18th St

Girl to guy: What's so funny? Did you fart?

–W 96th & Broadway

Overheard by: Megan W.

Santa, chasing scared teen: Do you think it's funny to throw things at people's heads? How about I break your face?

–42nd St

Girl: I'm really excited that, like, within our lifetime, there are gonna be funny movies about Obama.

–Manhattan Theatre Source

Overheard by: Emily B.

Laughing girl on phone: Come on, please! Please! Just take off your clothes and take pictures! (pause) Come on, mom, it would be so funny!

–Union Square

20-something skater guy to another: And then I started whackin' off, and it was hilarious.

–Broadway & E 10th St

Overheard by: Timothy