20-something women in yoga gear, simultaneously: It was like a blessing in cake form.
–Astor Place
Girl: I'm too single to eat a brownie.
–NYU Library
Guy on cell: Soft Serve is so good, you will step in dog poop and not even care!
–14th St b/w 7th & 8th
Serious guy on his way out of restaurant, to girl: So all we need are aspirin and Skittles.
–Angelo's Pizza
Assertive little boy in shopping cart seat, grabbing mom's face: I want to buy a chocolate croissant and eat it. Do you understand what I'm saying?
–Food Coop, Park Slope
Overheard by: Jenny
Archive for the ‘NYU’ Category
College Boys: Encapsulated.
College boy #1: The no-pants subway ride was fun.
College boy #2: Dude, they should combine that with that “go topless day”!
College boy #1: I know! When all the pictures are on the internet, it will save us all the trouble of having to jerk off between two different websites.
–NYU, Washington Square
Overheard by: Jaime L.
Charlie Brown Gets Very Upset With Linus
Loud guy running out of building: I'm so mad I could do stuff! I'm so pissed I'm going to do some stuff to him! Aughhhh! I'm gonna do some stuff!
Passerby: Don't make him mad, he's crazy. He'll do… stuff.
–NYU Building, Washington Square
Overheard by: Bruce Lee
Is It Wrong That I Think You're Hot?
Asian undergrad #1: You know that “boyfriend” jacket you tried on looked really good on you.
Asian undergrad #2: Yeah… That's because I have no tits.
Asian undergrad #1: Yeah, you're right.
–NYU Palladium Gym
Overheard by: Nel
Wednesday One-Liners Get Their Washington Square Park On
Mother, during tour: I noticed a lot of students have piercings. Can you recommend a good place around here?
–NYU
Grad student on cell: Hey, it's me. Tomorrow, dress appropriately. It's supposed to be 65, so I'll bring a frisbee. Afterward, I want to go to your place because there's certain things I want to do, and your place is much more (pause) conducive for certain activities.
–NYU
Overheard by: DrNels
Girl to another: I used to drink sangria before my classes at NYU.
–Rockefeller Center
NYU student to friend: Man, you gotta remember, you gotta know–you have to stuff that bitch. You gotta know.
–Weinstein Hall, University Place
NYU law student: You know what I love about this building? It smells like a new BMW.
–NYU Law Building
And Give Up My A-Cup Bra?
20-something college girl: So then they started to call me “zitty-titties”!
Friend: I told you to pop those!
–NYU
Overheard by: That's embarrassing
Only Homosexuals Say “Chill” Anymore
Bro-looking college kid #1: Dude, chill with that heteronormative shit.
Bro-looking college kid #2: Bro, are you shitting me? You're such a fag.
–NYU
Wednesday One-Liners Cunt Hardly Wait
Random girl: I think PETA should be informed any time an animal is fully submerged in a vagina.
–Webster Hall
Overheard by: Jen
20-something platinum blonde to another: Her vagina… Her vagina must be the size of, like, the Grand Canyon.
–7th Ave & 12th St
Girl, about her play: I don't think people are going to laugh about the vagina being killed on stage… Yeah, no one's gonna laugh when the vagina dies.
–NYU
Dude questioning another: What do mean by "moderate Taliban"? Like the women can wax their vaginas?
–Elizabeth Street
Young man shouting on cell: Then just tell her you don't like her vagina!
–26th St & Park Ave
The Crabs in Sombreros Were Kinda Cute, Though.
Girl #1: What do you mean?
Girl #2: I mean, it sucks to be her. I'd be pissed too if I got an STD after having sex with an illegal immigrant.
–NYU Dorm
The Final Solution to Wednesday One-Liners
College girl to friend: So I was looking through all my pictures… You know, all my pictures of Nazis.
–Central Park
Overheard by: ruegah
NYU film student to another, looking at picture of French actor Benoit Magimel: He's hot in that Hitler Youth kind of way.
–NYU Tisch Building
Guy to friend: Killing zombies is the new killing Nazis.
–1 Train
Overheard by: Preston
Random hipster: Sometimes I think Hitler was right.
–Music Hall of Williamsburg
Borders employee: I'm sorry, ma'am, we do have books about Hitler, but they're all for children.
–Borders