Archive for the ‘On the Subway’ Category

I Hope No Men Find Out How Foul Women Can Be

Female yuppie #1: … And it was smeared all over the walls of the stall!
Female yuppie #2: Oh my god, that is so disgusting.
Female yuppie #1: Yeah, I can’t believe someone would do that at work.
Female yuppie #2: I can’t believe someone would do that ever!

–South-bound G train

Overheard by: Kevin

Jesus Doesn’t Keep Flecking Our Faces with Spit

Subway preacher, after incoherent rant: So, can I get a ‘Hallelujah’? [Passengers silent.] Well, then can I get a ‘Thank you, Jesus!’? [Passengers silent.] Okay, then. Now I’m just going to talk to the born-again Christians on this train. Everybody else can ignore me — just like you’re ignoring Jesus!

–4 train

Overheard by: JVM

Wednesday XXX-Liners

Overly flamboyant gay guy on phone: There is no way he can put himself through law school doing hardcore gay porn!

–Soho

Overheard by: Anastassia

Gay boy to another: Pornstars make good money.

–L Train

Girl: He wants to make money, but all his plans involve me being in porn. You know how long it takes to make a $1000 in porn? Three months!

–Destination Bar, 13th & Ave A

Overheard by: erkala

Heavyset dude to chick watching the Olympics: So I was watching curling porn the other day…

–Lucky Jack's bar, Orchard St.

Overheard by: Ladle

Guy to friend: I saw that girl in a porn video last night. She has a cock.

–William & Cedar

Overheard by: Laura