Man: Her first husband told her he was gay after 7 years. Her second was a loveless marriage. And then she had coffee with me! –La Lanterna
Chick: I get in the cab and in five seconds Billy’s got his hands and nose pressed against the glass. And I’m like, stop that! That’s not funny. They’ll think we’re fucking tourists. They’ll take us like the longest fucking way from here. They think we’re fucking tourists. You are not excited by the Brooklyn Bridge! Or the Statue of Liberty! –Lafayette St.
A group of little kids are selling M&Ms on the train, perhaps to raise money for their school’s basketballing team. Homeless black dude with silver teeth enters and proceeds to yell at them. Hobo: I WANT WHAT’S IN YOUR BELLY! I WANT WHAT’S IN YOUR BELLY! –L Train Overheard by: Vickers Bastard Gringo
Bachelor: I’m going to find out where all the hookers are, and I’m going to buy that. –2nd Ave & 5th St.
German tourist: You can’t smoke inside and you can’t drink outside. What the hell do you people do in New York City? –Carroll Gardens Overheard by: Christopher
Techie: …and there was a strong correlation between the last two digits of their social security numbers and how much they spent on the site! – Office, midtown
Girl on cell: Hey! What’s new?…What?…I have no life. I don’t know what to tell you. –Union Square
Perceptive woman: Anytime you overhear people, if you only hear a second of what they say, it’s always completely stupid.
Overheard by: Todd Seavey
Meathead: I want to get the Jesus fish tattooed on my back with the Greek letters in it. But my Mom even has a problem with that! –D train
Guy: The bed shook. It shook with me. The bed shook. –26th & 3rd Contributed by: Megan Buckley