Archive for the ‘Only in New York’ Category

The Wheels on the Wednesday One-Liners Go Round and Round

Bus driver: The next stop on this bus is Fifth Avenue. Please have your passports ready! –M79 bus Bus driver: This is the Manhattan number one bus. Destination: San Juan, Puerto Rico. –M1 bus Bus driver: East Tremont Avenue, transfer to the 40 and 42… Put on those running shoes, there’s the 40 now! –Fordham-bound Bx22 bus Overheard by: Black Knight Bus driver: Okay, now everyone move to the right side of the bus. We’re running on three wheels today, and we have to stay balanced. –M14 bus Overheard by: Almost moved to the other side of the bus Bus driver: To your right you’ll see a bronze statue of Adam Clayton Powell, first black member of Congress… Looks like he’s runnin’ from the cops. –125th & Adam Clayton Powell Blvd Overheard by: sueinthecity Bus driver, about jackhammers outside: Do you hear that, people? That’s the sound of real labor! [Plays the sound of the jackhammers on the intercom] Embrace it! –Q88 bus

Confirmed: Biological Terrorism Hits New York

My guy friend and I stopped on the sidewalk to finish up a conversation and say goodbye. A man walks by and gave a hard shoulder nudge to my friend and kept walking. Guy friend: Yeah, excuse me!
Man: You stopped in the middle of the sidewalk. You can’t stop in the middle of the sidewalk; people need to get by. An argument ensues, then the man walks away. He changes his mind, walks back and gets within inches of my friend’s face. Man: I have a cold and I’m going to talk right in your face! –Broadway & Fulton Overheard by: Jessie