Bus driver: The next stop on this bus is Fifth Avenue. Please have your passports ready! –M79 bus Bus driver: This is the Manhattan number one bus. Destination: San Juan, Puerto Rico. –M1 bus Bus driver: East Tremont Avenue, transfer to the 40 and 42… Put on those running shoes, there’s the 40 now! –Fordham-bound Bx22 bus Overheard by: Black Knight Bus driver: Okay, now everyone move to the right side of the bus. We’re running on three wheels today, and we have to stay balanced. –M14 bus Overheard by: Almost moved to the other side of the bus Bus driver: To your right you’ll see a bronze statue of Adam Clayton Powell, first black member of Congress… Looks like he’s runnin’ from the cops. –125th & Adam Clayton Powell Blvd Overheard by: sueinthecity Bus driver, about jackhammers outside: Do you hear that, people? That’s the sound of real labor! [Plays the sound of the jackhammers on the intercom] Embrace it! –Q88 bus
My guy friend and I stopped on the sidewalk to finish up a conversation and say goodbye. A man walks by and gave a hard shoulder nudge to my friend and kept walking.
Guy friend: Yeah, excuse me!
Man: You stopped in the middle of the sidewalk. You can’t stop in the middle of the sidewalk; people need to get by. An argument ensues, then the man walks away. He changes his mind, walks back and gets within inches of my friend’s face. Man: I have a cold and I’m going to talk right in your face! –Broadway & Fulton Overheard by: Jessie
JAP: Can you believe it’s snowing upstate? It’s crazy.
Hispanic delivery man: Yeah.
JAP: Can you believe that that Yankee died? It’s crazy.
Hispanic delivery man: Yeah. –Empire State Building
Old time New Yorker to EMS workers and crowd: Sit down!
Suburban princess: God! Have some compassion! Can't you see she's sick?
Old time New Yorker: Fuck you! –Subway Series 2007, Shea Stadium Overheard by: Amazed Mets Fan
Old black lady: Bus driver, you a dumb motherfucker! You just turned down the wrong street!
Man: Don’t worry, Mr. Bus Driver, I still have faith in you.
Old black lady, to man: Get your faggot-ass off the bus! –8 bus, Bronx
Hobo, playing a saxophone awfully: I’m gon’ keep playing ’til somebody gives me some motherfucking money! –Downtown R train Overheard by: Eliot
Attorney: Wow, it’s really bad outside!
Front Desk Lady: I hope it’s not like that when it’s time to go home.
Attorney: Hey, don’t you live in Staten Island?
Front Desk Lady: No I don’t. And even if you buy me a $4 million house there, I still wouldn’t live in that dump. –Midtown office Overheard by: Felson
Woman #1: A car blew up on my street last night, and I was like,
“Here come the fuckin’ terrorists!”
Woman #2: Terrorists in Queens?
Woman #1: Not by me. Terrorists get shot in my neighborhood! –E train
Small Asian girl, crying on cell phone: Where are you guys?
Security guard: No talking on cell phones!
Asian girl: But… But I lost my friends.
Security guard: And no crying either! –The Met
Hipster to 50-something tourist who is blocking the way: Hey, lady, where you from?
Woman, proudly: Kansas.
Hipster: Well, Dorothy, this is not Kansas. This is Times Square, New York City, now get the fuck out of the way! (crowd cheers) –Times Square Overheard by: G-man