Young woman: Excuse me, is there any more room for you all to move in? The passengers just laughed at her as the doors closed. –A train, 86th St. station (The day after the fire)
Old lady: Please stop!
Conductor: I didn’t see you. The train pulls away. Old lady: Fuckhead. –23rd Street F station
Teenage girl: You know you're from New York when you've never been to the Empire State Building.
Mother, after pause: Oh, yeah…
Overheard by: Lindsey
Crazy lady at crosswalk: I am a professional jaywalker! If you jaywalk, I will give you a ticket! If you don't, I will not!
Young black woman: Yo! Being who I am, I will bop you on the head.
–E 124th St & Lexington
Overheard by: waitingforthefight
Guy to security guard: We're not fucking tourists, man, we're just trying to get back to our home in Jersey.
Overheard by: Confabulation Nation
Metrosexual guy: There are two kinds of people I will never, ever, date. One are people who are culturally ignorant. The second is people from New Jersey.
–45th & 5th
Overheard by: Mr. Pink
Proper British woman to loud drunk guy: Go back to Jersey!
–BB King Concert, Christ United Church
Overheard by: bb
Uptight 40-something white guy: I can't wait to get safely back in New Jersey!
Overheard by: JoshBob
20-something dude to another: It's so hard to get laid in this city before 11 pm!
Hottie: I am in New York City. You need to make $250,000 to live like a white person.
–28th & 29th
Overheard by: A black person from Chicago
20-something male to female: So you'd better be prepared. It's like the Times Square of New York.
–16th St & Union Square
Overheard by: Annie B
Middle-aged Hispanic dude to Indian salesperson: This is New York City. Nobody's gonna kill you, okay?
Young gay man: That's what I hate about New York City. It's such a fucking small town.
–14th St & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: molls
Local-seeming girl: So this is Chelsea.
Touristy guy: Hmmmm, smells really good!
(girl gives him dirty look)
–24th & 8th Ave
Girl on bench to woman walking past: Pardon me, do you have the time?
Woman, without stopping: No, I don't have the time for you, because you don't have a watch.
–19th St & Irving
Overheard by: Mikaela
Man: It's just frustrating walking behind really slow people.
Woman: He was handicapped!
Man: It's still frustrating.
–21st St & Park Ave
Driver being diverted past blockaded street: What's going on here?
Cop diverting traffic: What's going on? It's New York freaking City! That's what's going on! Move along!
–9th Ave & 20th St
Overheard by: Mighty Spatula