Archive for the ‘Pedophilia’ Category

Wednesday One-Liners Do the Vatican Rag

Suit on cell: No, I’m not coming in today…I’m on the Upper East Side. There’s all this traffic from the Pope’s "Don’t sodomize the kids" world tour. –83rd & Lex Guy at bar: Most Popes hate Jews. –6th and D Gamer kid: Yeah, I was in DC this weekend with the Pope… Yeah, I saw that muthafucka. –218th & Park Terrace West Overheard by: Kelley Old lady, about young girl: Oh, she looks nice. She’s wearing Pope shoes. –Carmine St Overheard by: arctinus

Wednesday One-Liners Cunt Hardly Wait

Random girl: I think PETA should be informed any time an animal is fully submerged in a vagina. –Webster Hall Overheard by: Jen 20-something platinum blonde to another: Her vagina… Her vagina must be the size of, like, the Grand Canyon. –7th Ave & 12th St Girl, about her play: I don't think people are going to laugh about the vagina being killed on stage… Yeah, no one's gonna laugh when the vagina dies. –NYU Dude questioning another: What do mean by "moderate Taliban"? Like the women can wax their vaginas? –Elizabeth Street Young man shouting on cell: Then just tell her you don't like her vagina! –26th St & Park Ave

What Is It About a Wednesday One-Liner in Uniform?

Security guard to another: I know it's habitual to act retarded. –Time Warner Security Check Overheard by: spandangle Security guard: The door's that way, people. I know that when you see a door you want to go through it–it's human nature. –Crown Plaza Hotel, Times Square Overheard by: GJL Female security guard: What does my sexual genitalia have to do with it? –Brooklyn Library Little boy: Mommy, mommy, look! They've got security guards! Must be a rich people place. –86th & Brooklyn Security guard, after metal detector beeps: Ma'am, would you please remove your wooden bracelet and walk back through the metal detector again? –Liberty Island Overheard by: heather linford Crazy security guard: I have so much gas. I'm going to take all my gas and send it to Iraq and end the war. (gets distracted by a girl walking past with an ice cream cone) Hey, you're stomach's gonna freeze! –NYU Dorm Overheard by: Honest Truth

Chis Hansen Appreciates What Keeps Him Employed

Guy #1: There are grown men who get with, like, 12-year-old girls. It's sick.
Guy #2: It's not sick, it's awesome! –39th & 7th Headline by: Chris Runners-Up:
· “Another Undercover Cop Passes the R Kelly ‘New Friend’ Test” – Bassmanbish
· “Fetal Attraction” – Jonathan
· “Henry Regrets Naming His Daughter Lolita” – Vasyl
· “In Prison, Greg Still Couldn’t Understand How the Sting Operation Worked.” – not impressed
· “Those Girls Are Considered 16 in China…” – David M
· “Welcome to Thailand” – the Sex tour operator
Click here to see the new Headline Contest

Because a Simple “Fuck Off” Just Isn't Very Classy

(very pretty girl waiting for the cross light to change)
Crazy old man: Yum, you sure are pretty.
(no response)
Crazy old man (excited now): Yummy! I like them pretty ones.
(pretty girl hisses at him and walks away)
Tourist dad to little girl: See, darling? That's how you handle those situations. –Broadway & Houston