Little Chinese Boy #1: You want to look at your dick.
Little Chinese Boy #2: You want to look at ass.
Little Chinese Boy #1: You want to look at pussy.
Little Chinese Boy #2: You want to look at your balls.
Little Chinese Boy #1: You’re gay.
Little Chinese Boy #2: Faggot.
–W Train
Archive for the ‘Penis’ Category
Queer Eye for the Queer Guy
Man: Just a little gay boy, yes. But a little gay boy with a big ass dick. –S. Williamsburg Ed.: What’s an ass dick?
Um, Let’s Call That Plan C…
Brainiac: You want self-esteem? Just go in there with a thirteen-inch cock. Now there’s your self-esteem! –58th & 5th Overheard by: Jodi B’holm
Seminal Wednesday One-liners
Hip Hop Guy on cell: I’ll just keep my nuts shaved and everything’ll be fine. –Varick Street Coffee guy on phone: I’m not talking about whacking off, I’m talking about fried chicken! –Alt.coffee, Avenue A Overheard by: Dibson Hoffweiler
That Is Happy!
Hobo: Damn, that nigga be happier than a faggot in a bag of dick. –125th & Lexington
It’s What God Gave Me
Chick on cell: Yeah, it was huge! They did it like twice, and she had to stay home from work the next day. She’s still sore. Now I’m supposed to see him tonight, and I don’t know what to do…OK, Mom! I’ll talk to you later! –Midtown
Ah, The Dangers of Voting
Guy: Yeah, man, that’s true. But you have to keep in mind that while you’re emotionally emasculated, he’s physically emasculated, and there’s a helluva difference. –Knitting Factory Overheard by: Patrick Taylor
I Liked It When Size Didn’t Matter
Chick #1: He was a skateboarder.
Chick #2: Yeah. Let me just say that he was locked and loaded. He had a nice package.
–Our Place, 3rd Avenue
Looks Like All of NYC is Talking About It Now…
Don Juan: Sure I got a seven inch dick, but the thing no one ever talks about is I got a seven inch ball sack, too. –Avenue A
Wednesday One-Liner Cheney
Guy to friends: She walks like she has a huge dick, that's how she walks!
–Office Building, 34th St & 3rd Ave
Overheard by: Spacedog ears
Drunk guy: So I put my dick in the hard drive.
–10th St & Ave A
Overheard by: guy walking dow street friday
Girl on cell: I can't compete with his dick!
–L Train
Overheard by: fuhggedaboudit
Angry hot girl to friend: Even if he's the biggest swinging dick in the world, so what?
–10th St & 5th Ave
Overheard by: jennifer tobias
Angry middle-aged woman to silent husband: I come home, I want some gin and some dick.
–59th St & Lexington Ave
Overheard by: Dave