Man: All I want is vaginal fluids. Been locked up for years upstate. –Astor Place Hipster dude: It smells like dirty vagina out here. –Graham & Richardson, Williamsburg Amateur gynecologist: I mean, when you think about it, he’s really just a big vagina with sand in it. –93rd & 3rd Frat guy: I don’t know, man…I just don’t trust her vagina. –Outside Ray’s Pizza, Houston St Overheard by: Becky Chubby teen: I’ve never even touched a vagina! –100th & Amsterdam Worker: They had a bet on who ate the best pussy. They get on the stage and take turns going down on her. –32nd & Madison Woman, to store clerk: Excuse me, do you knows where the pussy products is? –Duane Reade, 45th & 6th
Teen boy #1: Oh man, it was like an episode of I Love Lucy.
Teen boy #2: I love who?
Teen boy #1: Lucy. Oh man,you don’t know what I Love Lucy is? Bam! I ain’t your friend no more. –Q train
Hobo: Can you spare any change?
Man: Sorry, no.
Hobo: Who the hell you saying no to? I wasn’t asking you anyway, asshole! –106th & Broadway Overheard by: Leonor M.
Queer: Today Daisy totally showed me her vagina!
Girl: She shows everyone her vagina.
–3rd & 6th
Overheard by: zin
Two boys were playing on a fire escape. Boy #1: Okay. Now I’ll be the policeman, and you be the fireworks on Coney Island. –Windsor Terrace
Guy #1: I think you just stepped in pee, there.
Guy #2: Ew.
Guy #1: I think it was human.
Guy #2: Ew. It was kind of greenish.
Guy #1: Maybe it was antifreeze. Don’t lick your shoe or anything. Not that you should if it was pee, I mean. –26th & 2nd
Guy on cell: Of course I hate her! However, that’s not gonna stop me from fucking her. –Park Slope Girl: Your mouth is warm. Lick my face. –Forest Hills Overheard by: Sara R. Man on cell: I don’t see what the big deal was. It was only a blowjob. –Greene Street between Spring & Prince
Grandma: Baby for sale! Baby for sale!
Dad: Ma, don’t do that!
Grandma: What? They know it’s a joke! –Union Square Overheard by: Tina L
Guy: What flavor should I get?
Drunk girl: I’d get butter pecan but I’m lactose intolerant and it’d make me shit like a champ. –Bodega, Houston & 6th
Girl #1: No, dude, I’m telling you, all the men going to Paris right now are so gay.
Girl #2: Oh my god, that’s so not true. Johnny Depp lives there. Totally not gay.
Girl #1: Yeah, I guess…
Girl #2: Trust me, you’ll find someone to lose your virginity to there. I’m sure most of them are just, like, metro or bi, anyway. –Columbia University Overheard by: Pam Jones