Archive for the ‘People’ Category

Dorks: Want to Be Jabba the Hutt? Here’s How!

Chick #1: I am so pathetic.
Chick #2: You are not pathetic! If you and I lived together and did nothing but eat chocolate, guacamole and chips and ice cream and play Nintendo, and we ended up weighing 500 pounds each, but having weirdly toned hands and forearms from the Nintendo playing, that would be pathetic. –111th & Broadway Overheard by: djlindee

A New York Moment

A woman has a chihuahua in her purse. An old man enters the train. Old man: Cute dog. Do you take him everywhere?
Woman: Uh huh. We saw Spider-man yesterday.
Old man: You saw Spider-man yesterday?
Woman: Yeah.
Old man: How did you like it?
Woman: Oh, you know. It is what it is.
Old man: Not that great, huh? Ha, ha. Well, take care. The man leaves the train. The woman looks down at her dog. Woman: That was weird. –V Train

Orthodox Mormons Have All the Fun

Guy on cell: Hello?…What do you mean you have bad news?…You’re pregnant? How could you be pregnant?…I thought you were on the Pill? How did this happen?!…I just got engaged to your sister on the 4th of July…This is really bad news…How long have you known?…A week?! Why did you wait a week to tell me?…Your sister is going to go through the roof…No, she doesn’t come back until Monday…So, I’ll see you tonight?…I told you, I just got engaged to your sister. You can’t be pregnant…Okay, have a good afternoon.

He makes another call.

Guy on cell: Hey…You know Claire*?…Yeah, Lauren’s* sister…Yeah, the hot one…Well, she’s pregnant…Me!

–46th between 5th & 6th

And Start Smelling Me, So I Don’t Have to Shower Later

Woman: You shouldn’t smell all of those. It’s not nice to the people that will buy them. Besides, you’re not even buying one.
Girl: What makes you think I’m not buying one?
Woman: It’s just not nice for you to smell them, is all I’m saying.
Girl: What, I’m going to use up all the smell? Just stop talking to me.

–Candle section, Kmart, Penn Station

Overheard by: kier