A cashier hands a girl her change. Girl: Excuse me, but can you give me another 20 dollar bill? This one looks counterfeit. The cashier takes the bill, examines it, and puts it back in the register. He gives her another bill. Girl: Thanks. I just didn’t want that one, you know? It didn’t have the stripe down it. It looked too new. It just didn’t look right. So don’t give it to me; just give it to the guy behind me or something. –Bagel Maven, 7th Avenue
Guy: So you guys are Jewish?
Girl: Yeah, why?
Guy: Are you from Brooklyn? I live there now, and there are a lot of Jewish people there.
Girl: No, we’re from Staten Island.
Guy: Oh. Are there a lot of Jewish people there? –Finnerty’s, Union Square area Overheard by: Becka Dash
Into an unplugged phone, a hobo yells: Honey, honey, I told you not to call me in the office! –LES
Fratboy #1: Can she bring some of her friends?
Fratboy #2: You don’t want to meet her friends.
Fratboy #1: Why?
Fratboy #2: I don’t know, they’re…
Fratboy #1: They’re fat, right?
Fratboy #2: Yeah. –1 Train Overheard by: Josh Caldwell
Bimbo: So are you ever going to move back to Europe?
Eurotrash: I was thinking about that a couple of times when I was really, really depressed in LA. American culture is such a product of the country. –Soho
Yuppie #1: I only went to Brazil for a month, but on my third day there I met her.
Yuppie #2: Women in South America are so hot. Especially Brazil and Spain. –Belgian Beer Bar, Greenwich Village
Club Promoter: Do you guys like comedy shows?
Club Promoter: That wasn’t funny. –34th & 7th
Woman: He’s so horny he’d fuck a venetian blind. –Starbucks, UES
A trader is on his cell while on the toilet. Trader: Is there a time-frame here? Through the stall is heard the response. Trader #2: If you see sudden movements, we’ll know it’s time. –Trading floor bathroom, Park Avenue Plaza Overheard by: Aaron H.
The music stops. Hoochie: What happened? I was totally channeling J. Lo! Ah, whatever. I do what I want. –Delancey Lounge, LES