Archive for the ‘Politics’ Category

Just As Long As It's Chicks Who Are Willing to Sleep with Me

20-something hipster boy #1: So, you ever think that the US will stop being the most powerful nation in the world?
20-something hipster boy #2: Well, if not us, then who?
20-something hipster boy #3: They say China will take over eventually.
20-something hipster boy #2: China? What the hell are they gonna do, drop people on us?

–E Train

Overheard by: chinese girl who sat next to them

Pro or Con?

Girl #1: What’s with the people yelling?
Girl #2: It’s a protest about something.
Girl #1: What are they protesting?
Girl #2: I don’t know, the Bubonic Plague? –Washington Square SE Overheard by: Gradie Smith

Wednesday One-Liner: What Is It Good For?

Cleaner: What a pair of tits on that girl! That's why we go to war, that's why we're in Iraq!

–Service Elevator, Lexington & 41st St

Overheard by: Nicky

Annoying chick, about John McCain: I mean, he was a POW because he fucked up!

–Shea Stadium

Overheard by: megan

Security guard, breaking up fight during peace march: You can't fight at the peace march! You can't fight at the peace march!

–143 & Malcolm X

Woman to screaming three-year-old: And that's why you have to register to vote! Or else they'll draft you and you'll have to go to war!

–33rd & 2nd

Girl on phone: I can just get a pass from the Israeli army. Don't worry about it. They're easy.

–NYU Palladium Dining Hall

Which Speaker You Find More Annoying Says a Lot About You as a Person

Environmentalist with clipboard: Excuse me, do you have a minute to help save the environment?
Woman in suit: I’m sorry, I already saved the children this morning and then told the Democratic Party to go fuck themselves three blocks ago, so no, I don’t have time to save the environment today. Maybe tomorrow, hippie.

–Broadway & Bond

Overheard by: Betty Noir

New York’s Only Republican

Woman: Did you just watch the Presidential debate?
Man: Yes, we did.
Woman: Are you Kerry supporters?
Man: No, of course not. Kerry is the worst presidential candidate in the last 50 years and he would be the worst president ever.
Woman: Oh, do you want to come to Good Morning America tomorrow and stand outside, waving Kerry signs?
Man: I was being entirely serious. I hate Kerry. The woman looks at him, unbelieving, and walks away in silence. –Outside the San Marcos bar, East Village

It’s A World Of Laughter, A World Of Tears

Thirtysomething woman: You used to go to Disney World too? I LOVED that place.

Thirtysomething man: Yeah…What was the name of the part with the big carousel? You know, something Square…it was like the center of the park.

Thirtysomething woman: I don’t know…

Thirtysomething man: Tiananmen Square? Was that it?

Thirtysomething woman: Yeah! That sounds familiar..
–R train Headline by: Pam
Runners-Up:

· “Match.com really does work!” – katie andrews

· “Even less fun than Euro Disney” – MattyQ





Honorable Mentions:

· “Little known fact: Mao Zedong had a season pass” – Colleen Kerney

· “Where the rides are worse then the lines” – Mark Manne

· “Yeah, that part was a riot” – Skepna

· “No, No, Universal is NEXT DOOR” – Katie

· “He looked it up on google.cn” – Ingwall

· “And people were dying to get in” – Melanie Mahoney

· “Mickey Mao’s Club” – Dave Barnette

Click here to see the new Headline Contest


Today’s headline contest is being sponsored by HBO. The winner and runners-up* will all receive the complete Season 2 DVDs of Entourage.
Check out the season 3 premiere this Sunday, June 11th at 10pm!




(* Amended so that we could include more honorable mentions!)

Please Silence Your Phone During the Wednesday One-Liners

Preppy girl: I really loved that movie. I thought it was titillating… And not just because there was cock and balls. I don’t care about that.

–Third Avenue

Guy to self: Brokeback mountain… Starring Hillary Clinton!

–Herald Square Subway Station

Overheard by: Worst Movie Ever

Doofette: I mean like I know it got the Oscar and all, but I thought "No Country for Old Men" was pretty boring. I have to admit though the choreography was amazing.

–SoHo

Thug, peddling pile of DVDs: Ghetto Blockbuster! I am your ghetto Blockbuster! I got movies, CDs, porno. [Another group of customers walks in.] I got that action, comedy, romance and I got that pussy! I am your friendly neighborhood ghetto Blockbuster.

–24 Hour McDonalds, Water & Moore

Overheard by: BigKahuna&BigRed

Creepy hipster: You’d think you can’t have sex to "Silence of the Lambs"…

–Huron St, Greenpoint

Overheard by: sweetchuck

Dude on cell: If you like murder, you’re gonna love this movie!

–48 Bus